Rather than resolutions, I like to have goals. Some may take a week, some may take a year. Some I may need to do everyday to form a habit, some may be a one-off trip somewhere. So this is my list of 2021 ‘resolutions’ – my firm decisions to do, or not do, certain things đ
1. Finish off my fitness journey – strength and flexibility Ok, so I’m well aware that you can’t just be fit for a year and that’s it. What I mean by this is that by the end of this year I want to tick all three key fitness boxes so that I have a strong foundation for the rest of my life: cardiovascular fitness, strength and flexibility.
In 2020, I lost 2 stone by running throughout lockdown. I lost mainly fat, and some muscle because gyms were infrequently open. This weight loss has meant that I now have a healthy BMI, a health waist circumference and a healthy waist to hip ratio (I already had good cholesterol and blood pressure). As a result of the running and weight loss, my cardio fitness is FAR better than it ever has been – I can do a 5k in under 27 minutes and a 10k in under an hour. I also really got into the nuances of nutrition and I understand the calories I should eat to maintain weight, how much protein I need and how to get all my vitamins/minerals. Whoop!
So, in 2021 I’m going to improve my strength and flexibility, whilst keeping up the cardio and healthy eating. Main things I’m going to do are:
Overeat less (I do this more than I should, so I do cardio to burn more calories, and as a result do far less strength training at the gym than I should
Do more strength training: on average 3 times per week (either with gym weights or body weight at home)
Start up yoga again and do this 2-4 times per week
Keep running 3 times 5k per week (ideally I want to really do 20k per week – I was averaging 25k in summer!)
I absolutely will not stick to this week in, week out. But I’m going to get into the routine in January and February while we’re still locked down so that by the end of September 2021 (ish) I’ve put on muscle and also lost more fat. I’m very happy with the numbers on the scale at the moment and for me, staying the same weight is absolutely fine – I want to be stronger and fitter, not lighter đ
2. Listen more/better I used to be a real pain – shouting people down if they didn’t agree with my way of thinking, telling people what they should do when they hadn’t asked for my advice. I still do the lesser to an extent and I really want to try and rein it in.
When most people ask for advice, they’ve made a decision already, and they’re looking for reassurance. When most people complain, they don’t want you to solve the problem, they just want you to listen.
“You’ve fallen into a classic trap, Christopher – trying to fix a woman’s problems instead of just listening to what they are.”
I need to do far more reassuring and listening than advice-giving and problem-solving this year. It’ll be very hard as it goes against my instincts, but some of my friends are going through big life changes (namely having kids) and I just need to think more about what they want to say, not what they need to hear (IMO). It’ll make me a better girlfriend/friend and, I hope, help my friends too đ
3. Keep learning about my diabetes to keep it even better controlled …which I generally do anyway, but I’ve noticed over the last few years I have some unique things that only happen to me, so I want to record them and look for patterns so I can control my diabetes even better than usual.
For example, I know that my levels will drop by 3 points during a 5k run. I know that I need to give myself 50% of my usual insulin dose whenever I eat pizza, otherwise I go low. I know that if I give myself more than 6 units of insulin, I will go low – even if I eat enough 9 units’ worth! I know I need to have juice and not glucose tablets if I’m low before bed. I know that it takes my blood glucose more like 20 minutes to pick up, not 10. Etc!
4. Get my finances in even better shape They’re already in very good shape to be honest – by the end of March I’ll have paid off my student loan, WHOOP. I already have enough for a 30% deposit on a 3 bed in London. But these are all shorter term wins.
I want to also make sure that on top of the deposit money I have: ÂŁ10,000 for emergencies Saved 40% of my salary (15% into diverse acc funds, 25% into an ISA/Help to Buy) every month
To do this will be reasonably easy, but being able to travel when this pandemic is over will mean I just need to be a bit more careful than I was in 2020 (a year in which I has to re-purchase a lot of my wardrobe due to my weight loss…). But also, I want to make sure I don’t hold myself back and do all the things I want to do this year when I want to do them because life is short.
5. Learn Turkish My boyfriend of about 3 months is Turkish and at some point in 2021, COVID permitting, we’re planning on going to Turkey. His parents don’t speak much English and I’ve always wanted to learn a language, so I’ve decided to learn Turkish!
I’ve tried learning many languages before but I always hit upon two big stumbling blocks: I had no practical use for the languages and I had no one to practise with.
So, hopefully, I’ll at last be able to converse in another language by the end of 2021. And despite Turkish not exactly being the most helpful language in the world, I’m already learning a lot about the English language just by learning another (e.g. the accusative tense, the 7 conjunctions). And I LOVE language generally, so the whole process is actually really fun for me.
I’ll also try and keep this blog updated in 2021 and try and back-fill it with the trips I took over the last 2 years. Watch this space.
So I haven’t updated this blog in about two years. Which is a real shame because I started this blog with the intention of chronicling my travel adventures for when I’m older and my memory has faded… so perhaps in 2021 I’ll retrace my travel steps from 2019-2020 and update this ol’ thing.
Based on the minimal amount of travelling I did in 2020 that might actually be quite easy…
So what have I been up to? A short, two-year summary.
2019 saw me:
January: Started the year in Berlin, having been made a permanent member of the KAYAK Team
February: Aaaand in February the whole Berlin team got made redundant! I was offered my job but in Copenhagen, which I declined.
March/April: So, at the end of March I left Berlin and went on my first trip: two weeks in Egypt
May/June: Then, I spent 2.5 months in South America – Brazil, Argentina, Chile and Easter Island, Bolivia, Peru, Ecuador and the Galapagos Islands. It was pretty damn epic.
July: Next trip! Went to Uganda, Rwanda and finished in Kenya
August: moved back in with Mum, got myself a new job at FHF in London
September: Spent the month in AirBnBs while I looked for a place to live
October: Moved into my new flat in Clapham Junction
December: broke up with Mark, who I’d been seeing for three years and had officially been with for one. Just wasn’t working or making me happy anymore – I was more unhappy and pissed off than not and based on the live advice I take from Fiddy, things had to end:
You should love it, way more than you hate it
50 Cent – In Da Club
And then came 2020. Which, for most people, has been a terrible year. For me? I had one very bad thing happen and everything else was brilliant. Honestly, if my Nana hadn’t passed away this would probably go down as one of the best years of my life. I think it’s because I can’t sit still – so, being forced to stay at home for the whole year was never going to sit well with me. So, I did things. Spoke to people. Progressed towards my goals.
This is roughly how my 2020 went:
Highlights
Losing about 1.5-2 stone and getting down to a healthy BMI, healthy waist and health waist-hip ratio
My Nana’s 100th birthday and being with her to celebrate + seeing her childhood homes
Meeting Olcay and ending the year with a bloody lovely boyfriend – and spending my birthday, Christmas and New Year with him đ
Run my first 10k and do so in under an hour – and get my 5k down to 26 minutes
My H1 lockdown romance (he was good company even if it didn’t go anywhere)
Getting my new job at Amazon and being very financially secure throughout 2020
Surviving COVID19 and not even remotely mentally struggling like so many people
Nick and Tim adopting three children!!
Katie and Olly getting pregnant!
Lowlights
Nana Coates passing away – I’m so thankful I spoke to her so much this year and got to see her not too long before she died.
Getting COVID19 – wasn’t that bad, more the media scaremongering that made it bad.
Feeling like I wasted a fair bit of time with Dave 1 – although that whole process led me to Olcay, so s’all good in the end. Just thankful he showed his true self before it got super serious.
January Newly single, and just been told by my landlord that they’re selling the flat and I need to move out by the end of February. Which is a shame because I really liked my flatmate Esha, but also the flat was full of mould, so s’all good. I also go to Pittsburgh for work (Philips) and had a lovely time exploring the city – really cool restaurants but not somewhere I’d be desperate to go back to. A few days was enough.
End of January, I took my Nana and my Dad to Edinburgh for the weekend for Burns Night. My Nana LOVED the AirBnB we stayed in and she seemed to have a lovely time. We went to a pub and had Burns Supper and whiskey and listened to a bagpipe band. Nan couldn’t hear anything but she just liked being with me and Dad đ We also went to a couple of art galleries and the big museum in Edinburgh – as well as a vegan restaurant which Nana actually liked!
February Decided to expand my flat search a little further afield and found a GREAT place in Putney. I had a week of waiting and was told by Neelam that I got the room – I move in in March. I had to move all my things out in February and stay with Ruveni for a few nights between flats – all my stuff went into storage.
I went to Eindhoven for another work trip at the end of February with Chloe and Jade. After this I ended up being really good friends with Jade and I’ve met her a lot over 2020 as she lives close to Putney.
March Moved into my flat in Putney and about 3 weeks later, the country went into lockdown for the first time. COVID19 had been sort of a thing, but it wasn’t until the start of March until anyone got worried.
Thankfully, my flat in Putney is a huge double room with an en-suite, so I take up 30 days of yoga and re-start my Couch to 5k because I’m surrounded by big parks and the lovely Thames Path.
April I decide that I’m ready to start dating and, because I think lockdown won’t last that long, I go back on dating sites. I end up chatting to a ginger guy called Dave, who I end up speaking to a lot throughout April, May and June.
I also start running again this month and by the end of April, I’ve done my first 5k! The running leads to me losing about 1.5 stone.
My holiday to India is cancelled too, obvs, And my flatmate Neelam (a teacher) goes home to Coventry because schools are shut, so I spend the next few months with my other new flatmate Megan, who ends up being awesome and we not get on really well!
I also get COVID19 in April which suuucks. I’m feel really crap (fever, tired, aching, night sweats) for 10 days and I don’t leave the house for 2 weeks. Annoyingly, it’s BOILING HOT and my top floor room is an oven, so that was fun… I’m calling my Nana every other day at this point because I hate the thought of her being lonely – we’re getting on really well and she tells me she can talk to me more easily than anyone else in the family, which fills my heart with joy. I got really close to Nana this year, more so than ever.
May First Zoom date with Dave – lasts about 6 hours. I also get a Whatsapp from my old boss Chris, telling me he’s got a job at Amazon and he’d like to know if I fancy applying for a role on his team. At this point, I’m bored at work and although the people on my team (Chloe, Emily, Vale, Melissa) are LOVELY, I apply for the role.
May is the month when I properly get into Zooming with friends and Whatsapp video calls – Charlotte, Ruveni, Emma and lots of in-face coffee catch ups outdoors with Jade, because the weather is still amazing.
I progress to the boring blue face masks because the elastic on my colourful super cool ones starts to go. BOO.
June After 2 months of speaking every day, I meet Dave. Easy to chat with, definite spark. Leave the date (in St James’ Park) feeling very happy and my expectations far too high.
NANA COATES TURNS 100! Her birthday is the day before lockdown ends so Chris and I naughtily travel oop north to surprise her – she looks so happy to see us when we pop round the corner! Jackie, Bob, Dad and his neighbour and Phil all come and Nana gets her birthday card from the Queen, 5 cakes (Jackie’s sets on fire – epic) and tells us stories from her life. She looks lovely. Frustratingly, she cries because Victoria doesn’t come which makes me want to punch Victoria, but overall she’s surrounded by all the people she loves – which is huge as the party we had planned for her couldn’t go ahead đŠ
I get offered the job at Amazon and I accept.
July Meet up with Dave in person a few more times, but he starts to wear a little thing because he’s not putting in the effort I want and he’s not great at communicating. Plus, he’s slowly opening up about how right wing he is, which I don’t like. So, by the end of June, we’ve decided to call it a day. Which is fine, because Dave 2 is around at this point, so he keeps me entertained.
This is the month when fir a few weeks in a ow, I weight in at under 10 stone consistently. I’m down from a size 12-14 to a solid size 10 and I’m feeling really happy about my health and how I look.
End of July I go and visit Nick and Tim to celebrate Nick’s birthday. We don’t go wild, but it’s so lovely to actually go and SEE friends after about 6 months of not being able to do so!
Black Lives Matter REALLY kicks off.
August I go and visit Nana and Dad at the very start of August and I don’t realise this will be the last time I see my Nana đŠ I’m so happy I stay in Clitheroe for 6 days (#workingfromhome), so we can send time going to Wigan and Billinge to see the farm where she was born and the farm where she grew up. She’s so so happy showing Dad and I around that day.
Things fizzle out with Dave 2, and I go on a few forgettable dates. Eat out to help out kicks in so I go to lots of restaurants – and of course this ends up spreading COVID19 around more. The government this year have been terrible at communicating and planning ahead and learning from anything. Pretty much the only decent thing they did was create the furlough scheme.
Which my brother and Jude have been on for months, and both of them get made redundant this month. (Thankfully, by the end of 2020 they both have new jobs, yay!)
Nana Coates falls over in Clitheroe and has to go to hospital as she’s fractured her arm and it hurts her to walk. I call her 1-2 times per week in hospital and she seems really happy to hear from me. I wish I’d been able to get through to her more often.
September I decide last minute to go to Glasgow and climb Ben Nevis – my only holidays this year are to Scotland! I meet Fiona (friend I made on my Uganda trip last year) and we get on super well which is ace. AND I TOTALLY CLIMB BEN NEVIS! The Scottish Highlands are gorgeous and I’d like to go back to Glasgow one day when things are back to normal – a lot was closed (museums, for example) due to COVID19.
I start my job at Amazon after a very loooong notice period. Nice to be working with Chris and Jess again!
I then go to Milton Keyne to cat and dog sit for Nick and Tim, as they head up north to meet their THREE CHILDREN (argh!) for the first time. This confirms for me I absolutely do not want a dog.
While I’m there, my Nana comes out of hospital and we’re all hopeful. I call Nana and she’s so so happy to be back home. A day later, she has a stroke and then she passes away in the early hours of the morning, apparently in no pain and with a nurse by her side. As soon as she had her stroke, I tried to go up north to see her, but only Dad and Jackie are allowed to visit her due to COVID19.
I’m devastated and cry for days. I haven’t been so heartbroken in a very, very long time.
October Nana’s funeral. I go with Mum and Chris and it’s simple, which Nana would have liked. I do a reading and cry through it. I can’t believe she’s gone. Honestly, 2020 had/has actually been a great year overall, but I can’t say that and ever mean it and feel good about it because of Nana’s passing.
When Nana passed away I came off dating apps, but I decide to go on them again, to distract myself and because a lockdown is imminent. I match with a guy called Olcay.
I go for a bottomless prosecco cake brunch with Emma on October 10th and end up getting very drunk. Olcay messages me and asks me out and I decide that I should just go for it. We get on really well.
I also happen to get herpes which is INSANELY PAINFUL. Honestly, the worst pain I’ve ever been in that I can remember. Can’t go to the toilet, can’t sit down. NIGHTMARE.
In October, I catch up with Jade, Esha, Ruveni, go home to visit Mum on the year anniversary of Dave’s passing, see Jude and end up going on about 2-3 dates per week with Olcay. At the end of October, the UK goes into a month long lockdown again.
November By now I’m pretty settled into my new job, I’m still running and keeping the weight off, I’ve started investing in the stock market and I’m seeing Olcay pretty regularly. By the end of November we’re boyf and girlf, I’ve met one of his friends and we’ve had a Thanksgiving dinner with his brother, step sister and his best friend.
That aside, the country is still locked down, so not a lot to do…
December And here we are. This month, Olcay met my Mum (I took her to an exhibition in London for her birthday) and I manage to book an outdoor table and I get to see Nick, Ruveni, Olcay, Olly and Jude for my birthday celebrations. Which I take as a big win considering how mad the year has been and the fact we can only meet outdoors!
We go into a Tier 3 lockdown on December 16th, but Olcay and I end up going to Greenwich and outdoor ice skating (and eating a lot of fudge) for my birthday. We have Honest Burger, mulled win and get the boat from Greenwich to Putney.
Tier 4 lockdown hits and I have a few hours to get outta London and get to Wallingford for Christmas. I invite Olcay to Wallingford for Christmas and it’s lovely spending it with him – the house feels fuller and we all just eat, drink, open presents, go for nice walks and watch a lot of TV.
As for New Year’s Eve plans, Olcay and I are going to stay in (obvs) watch When Harry Met Sally, drink champagne, have a fancy dinner and dress up in black tie and see in the new year together. My first Christmas with a boyfriend and my first NYE with a boyfriend. It’s been a wild year.
I’ll do a post about my 2021 goals, hopes, resolutions, whatever you want to call them tomorrow.
I have been useless at keep this blog going. I always say it’s because I’m busy (I have been) but really it’s because I’ve just been prioritising other things that are completely not worth my while. Like re-watching every episode of Friends on Netflix. Like deciding I wanted to learn all there is to know about the killing of Tupac Shakur. Like browsing ASOS for things I don’t need.
So, I’m not going to change my habits overnight, but 2019 feels like the year to start bettering myself again rather than coasting. In my career (final 3 months of the year aside) I coasted. I coasted at home, in my relationship, everything. Not that coasting is a bad thing: I think I needed it in 2018. I’m so full on all the time, it was kinda nice to watch crap TV, put on half a stone and just enjoy numerous holidays without them all needing to be unusual, adrenaline filled trips.
So, imma do a 2018 summary before I lead onto my 2019 aims. It’s been quite a year and, when I think about it, I’ve achieved a lot despite this blog post starting off sounding like I haven’t!
Personal
The Commander
At the start of the year I was in a job that wasn’t fulfilling me – but it was only after I quit that I realised how much it was limiting my potential. The real turning point personally was when I got 360 feedback from my peers. In hindsight, I realise that I shouldn’t have taken it so personally and their feedback was all rooted in the fact they didn’t understand my job and I’d been dealing with them badly. But, at the time the feedback made me really look inside myself.
So, the feedback was basically: she’s tough to work with and she thinks she’s always right. Both of these comments are totally fair. I am and I do. My old boss even told me he’d been ‘warned’ about me – yikes. So I decided after years of not really asking myself why I am the way I am: I asked.
I did a 16 Personalities test and it nailed me. I got an ENTJ , ‘The Commander’. And the 10 page summary couldn’t have described me better. It described me in a way that I wouldn’t ever have been able to describe myself. Srsly: The underlying thought running through the ENTJ mind might be something like “I donât care if you call me an insensitive b*****d, as long as I remain an efficient b*****d”.
So, long story short, as a result I started seeing a counsellor. Not because I have any major childhood issues or that I’m unhappy. But because once I saw who I am I wanted to better understand how I got that way. Turns out, counsellors ROCK. Seriously, I saw a wonderful lady, free of charge, all thanks to The Caravan in Piccadilly that gives experience to people training to get their qualification to be various kinds of counsellors.
Over the course of a few months, I became a better person. I understand why I am the way I am (nearly all to do with my parents, obviously) and started to better understand how to be less tough to deal with. Most importantly? I learned that I’m pretty awesome not difficult, not cold, I just handle things in a certain way and now I know that, I can better adapt my behaviour to other people. Over the last few months, I’ve stopped holding onto grudges or being determined to win arguments. I just let stuff go. I LET IT GO. I NEVER did that. And it’s a total joy! I’m more patient. And I think further in advance before I speak. Etc etc. Basically, I’ve learned a HUGE amount about myself – good and bad – and I’m so much better for it đ
DAFNE
I’ve been meaning to go on a DAFNE course for years. It’s a course for Type 1 Diabetics who have either had it for ages (me) or who don’t control it well. I spent a week learning a load of stuff non-Diabetics will find super dull: like the fact I should give my novarapid 10 minutes before I eat and the fact it takes food and insulin 1 hours to get into my system.
Anyway, I won’t bore on about it but the course was immense and I’d recommend any diabetic going on it. IT’s made me a lot more conscious of my health and I’ve realised there’s fuck all point watching my diet and going to the gym if I’m not going to have total control of my diabetes.
A non-legit relationship
For the last 2.33ish years I’ve been seeing but not seeing someone. This is still happening. Which is nice. It’s nice to have someone there without losing myself into a couple like many people do. I think that’s a good thing, for me, as I’ve grown a lot this year and to lose some of myself to another person would have been a nightmare. Anyway, I won’t go into lots of detail, but I’ve been more happy than not over the course of the last year and a fair bit of that is to do with him. So that’s nice, innit.
(Commanders are terrible at expressing emotions, so make of that what you will, lol.)
Friends and weddings and then more weddings and friends
2018 was the year of the wedding. Some glorious friends of mine (Emma and Olly/Katie and Cate) all got hitched this year and it was bloody joyful seeing them all happy and wedded.
I also made some new friends (SO HARD TO DO IN YOUR LATE TWENTIES, especially if they’re not friends of your partner?!) which was ace too. One of them is a Commander too!
I also went on a glorious Greek holiday with Nat Nat. Not that we become friends or ever stopped, but it’s been about 4 years since we’ve properly spent time together so 2 weeks in the Greek sunshine was a bloody pleasure â€
Professional
I took a big risk this year and handed in my notice with no job lined up. Hadn’t even been on an interview.
Basically, I wanted to leave in August 2017 but a new boss got hired who I thought I could learn something from, so I hung on. And for 6 months things got better, but in about June/July 2018 I just felt like things had stagnated. Then, I went on holiday to Croatia and as soon as I decided to just quit it’s like this huge weight got lifted off of my shoulders. I felt lighter. So I returned to work, handed in my notice and then started looking for work!
I went on about a million interviews over the course of 2 months and after about 6 weeks, job offers started coming in. I think I got 4 job offers in the space of 3 weeks (yay) and the one I ended up going for led me to another adventure
I’m now at KAYAK and managing a team of 9 people and I’m actually being challenged again, yay!
I’ve also done a lot of work for LionAid so far this year which has resulted in raising hundreds of pounds for them already! True, it’s not a lot, but it’s a big increase ad now I’ve completed their website, I’m really looking forward to helping a great charity help protect wild African lions in 2019.
Travel My aim in 2018 was to be in a different country every month. Which I managed!
January/February: Poland (Auschwitz). I flew into Katowice which was a far cooler city than I expected and learned so much at Auschwitz. So much. One of the most poignant quotes hanging on a wall there was ‘Those who do not remember history are condemned to repeat it’. Tough as it was, I can’t recommend it enough.
March/April: Cambodia (+ a bit of Thailand and Vietnam). Another trip that was very tough in places, especially in Phnom Penh and the killing fields. But Cambodia is filled with such lovely people – so welcoming – and it’s a stunning place. The home stay I did was a real highlight, as was the morning I spent trekking through the rain forest there. Ankor Wat was majestic as you’d expect and I loved zip lining through the forest. And Ho Chi Mihn City has buzzing – I particularly loved the veggie food tour I went on and discovered a taste for durian fruit!
May: Italy (Venice). A place I’d been meaning to go for the longest time. And one of the few hyped places that actually met expectations! Stunning winding alleyways, Burano was an explosion of colour, APEROL SPRITZ ALL DAY ERRYDAY and I basically ate all the food and caught all the sun.
June/July: Croatia. I went to Zagreb, Plitvice National Park, Split and Hvar. The weather was beautiful and I happened to be there when Croatia got through to the World Cup finals! Plitvice Park was beautiful, the waters in Hvar were turquoise and crystal clear. Went to a nudist beach (fun!), GOT A FOOT TAN and went on a brilliant history walking tour in Split – go go go!
August: Spain (Barcelona). Olly and Katie’s StagHen do! It involved tapas, karaoke, beach, an inflatable obstacle course (which resulted in a trip to A&E, long story), good food and a night out on the town. It was so much fun celebrating with them!
September/October: Greece. Specifically, Santorini, Paros, Mykonos and Anthens. Nat and I went on a 2 week holiday and it was so good! Well, apart from the Medicane… we were meant to only be on Santorini for 3 days but ended up staying for 6 and missing Naxos because our bloody ferry was cancelled! That aside, we ate ALL THE FOOD and I’m now obsessed with Greek food (courgette frittersss), the Greek cats, relaxing beach days, less relaxing beach days where we had to hike up a hill to get to the red beach and that amazing veggie restaurant.
..and one that combines them all!
November/December: I moved to Berlin! I basically applied for a job in London, and getting the job then required me to move to Berlin. So I did!
It took me a month to find a place to live, but I’m no longer in Battersea (still very much where my heart is though) and I’m living in Friedrichshein. True, I was happy with my life in London but I just knew if I didn’t move and work abroad once in my life I’d regret it, so I decided to seize the opportunity đ
Who knows how long I’ll be there – but I’m enjoying the experience so we’ll see.
2018 summary
In 2018 I started to live my life based on two things/quotes/mentalities as much as I can. Quitting my job, moving to Berlin, my travels, my relationships, everything!
“You should love it way more than you hate it” – the wise words of 50 Cent.
+ I make big decisions based on whether I’ll regret it/regret not doing it on my deathbed.
2019 shiz
Ok, so I’m going to avoid calling these ‘resolutions’ because I won’t stick to them that way. These are more ‘focuses’ for 2019. If that makes them any less resolution-y. Nope? Ok. Whatever.
Focus on my health and fitness again
Basically, I got really fit and lost lots of weight in 2015/2016. 2017 I maintained weight and then in 2018 I got all happy and busy and put some back on. So in 2019 I’m going to get back to the gym and do a mix of cardio and weights. And I’m going to do the weights PROPERLY this time. I’m aiming to get stronger and slimmer but still keep my thunder thighs.
I’m also going to keep up my health habit tracker. 10,000 steps a day, 5 portions of fruit and veg per day, cut back on booze and chocolate, drink 2l of water a day.. etc. A lot of this I did anyway, so this should be easier than it sounds.
Re-do the ‘one country per month’ thing
I already have some cool trips planned. Dubai in January, Egypt in April, Bavaria (Germany) in June, GLASTONBURY in July (yes, I’m counting returning to the homeland as a new country…) and I’m also planning a trip to Mallorca, Zambia and Tanzania and San Francisco!
I really want to make the most of living in mainland Europe so I’m also going to try to get an overnight train to Budapest and head down to Vienna too. WHOOP.
New skills
This is basically: learn German. Honestly, I’m going to try. I think it’ll be painful, but goddammit, I want to be able to order more than a large matcha latte in German (Eine gross matcha latter mit mandlemilsch bitte). (That was all wrong FYI.)
Do more for the animals
I turned veggie at the start of 2018 and I’m still veggie. In 2019 I want to make sure I’m more careful when it comes to reading labels – a few times in 2018 I accidentally ate rennet and gelatin, so none of those mistakes this year!
I’m going to continue working with LionAid in 2019 and I’m hoping to get them even more donations so they can continue to help protect lions in Africa.
I also want to do more to help animals rights campaigners. I’m not sure how. I’m sure my friends Nat and Charlotte can help me work out how, but there is a an animal rights march in Berlin in the summer, so I might get involved in organising that.
Iâve never done a cold holiday before. Well, not intentionally. I went to Chicago in winter a few years ago and FROZE but stupidly didnât realise just how cold it would be.
Last November I was in India. This October, I was doing jury service â so I had time booked off work but nothing *actually* booked. By the time I got out of jury service the Northern Lights were in my head and I couldnât get them out⊠so I decided to spend 12 days exploring Finland (and Finnish Lapland) and Iceland. Yes, it was super cold. It snowed. I had to purchase thermals, thermal socks, thermal gloves and a ski jacket. But it was totally worth it and a trip I couldnât recommend enough!
Over the course of 12 days, I crammed so much into my holiday. If I didnât have a big âthingâ to do on a particular day (flying, hiking, snorkelling, husky sleighing) then I walked 10 miles per day around whichever place I happened to be in. So, I have a fair bit I want to remember, and this blog post should cover all of my adventures.
FINLAND (Helsinki) EAT: Before heading to Lapland, I stayed one night in Helsinki, in a North Western part of town called Toolo. I stayed in Toolo Towers (uni accommodation that they rent out) and I kinda assumed that Iâd be a little bit in the middle of nowhere. True, the area directly around me wasnât bursting with trendy eateries, but there were a few gems. One of which is Linko Pizzabar.
Itâs a cosily-lit bar/restaurant which is pretty informal and also does live music. They have all the pizza written up by the bar on a chalkboard and you pay at the bar. They have a pretty damn delicious sounding menu. I like to try local delicacies and ânew thingsâ (wanker traveller alert) when Iâm abroad, so I decided that a combination of lingonberry and reindeer pizza was exactly what I need.
So: blinit. Basically, itâs a Russian traditional disk and Finland has got their own take on it. Blinit are thick savoury pancakes which are served with pickles, honey and sour cream. The Russian version are thinner but in Finland, theyâre fat and packed with herbs too. The pickles, sour cream and honey is a really odd combination and even though itâs a bit of an acquired taste, I did enjoy it. But it definitely wonât be to everyoneâs liking!
Cella as a restaurant? It was ok. It seemed popular with the locals and itâs one of the few places to get blinit outside of January, but itâs not an absolute must-visit unless you fancy the sound of the blinit!
Macha (if you donât know) is the ground powder of green tea leaves. Itâs stronger than green tea and the way the leaves are ground means you get a lovely intense colour when mixed with milk too. Mizu is just around the corner from the Rock Church, so pop in after youâve marvelled at that!
SEE: Helsinki isnât like London. Or Paris. Or Rome. There arenât endless numbers of historical buildings and museums to keep a traveller entertained and informed â you can do all the âkeyâ sites in a day. But as I had three days to make the most of the city, I started to branch out on day two and seek out things that particularly interest me, and one of them was the Kiasma Modern Art Museum.
As I work in digital/social media, one of the exhibitions on particularly interested me: ARS17. ARS17 is a major exhibition of international contemporary art on the theme of digital revolution. The exhibition will showcase artists of the new millennium and offer a fresh approach to contemporary art by also expanding the viewing experience into the online realm.
Some highlights of the exhibition for me where an immersive video installation which has you sit in a calm, serene forest which you watch crumble away as dark image from the world of gaming force themselves into the frame. This is surrounded by beautifully haunting sculptures by Jon Rafeman of animals eating themselves (vorarephilia, the erotic desire to eat another person or creature) as a way of showing our desire to constantly feed on digital stimuli.
Another fave piece of work for me was by Charles Richardson: a floral sofa facing a video playing the Afro-American spiritual song Dem Bones, as the video shows how we now construct our identities via tech devices and possessions.
SEE: Helsinki has a stoooorming bar scene. If you like your cocktails unique and your bars speak-easy style (and lighting dimmed) then Helsinki has plenty to offer. I went to two bars which I particularly loved and one is called Trillby and Chadwick Detective Agency.
If youâre a Londoner, youâll have heard of the Evans and Peel Detective Agency. Trillby and Chadwick is the same thing, basically. A hidden door on a quiet street and a secret entrance leads you into a beautifully decorate speakeasy style bar with gorgeous cocktails. I had a PROPER NIGHTMARE finding the bar, so imma help you out: thereâs a little archway that leads you to a shop called Lumoan: if youâre facing the archway, itâs the door on the left hand side of the archway đ
You canât take photos in the bar because they naturally want to keep its secrets, err, secret. But the cocktail menu is brilliant and written out like a detective story and the drinks are delicious. They even have an âexperimentalâ cocktail menu on which you can find cocktails featuring cheese, meats and more⊠give it a try if youâre feeling adventurous!
The second bar was at the end of the main high street, and itâs called Liberty or Death. This is owned by the same group that owns Trillby and Chadwick Detective Agency, and pretty much all of the other trendy bars in Helsinki (like Liberty or Death, 100 dogs or Antiques and Books).
The bar is really small and it plays laid-back hip hop music while super-cool bartenders avoid making eye contact (true hipsters, hah). The cocktail list was short but has a little something for everyone. Itâs well worth a stop if youâre in this part of town, or if youâre staying in the same (brilliant!) hostel I did: Hostel Diana Park.
LISTEN: Iâm putting the Rock Church under âlistenâ because when I arrived there happened to be a piano/opera recital happening in there: which was EPIC.
The church is carved into rock from the Ice Age and it creates not only a beautiful sight, but beautiful acoustics too. The rock lines the walls with a semi-glass ceiling and plenty of candles to add to the atmosphere. Itâs only open at certain times for the public (and on certain days) so make sure you check before you arrive. True, Iâm not making it sound like much, but itâs a proper architectural feat and one of the main âattractionsâ in Helsinki: plus, itâs in a lovely area with a few nice cafes and second-hand/vintage shops close by.
If there hadnât have been music on, itâs a lovely quiet haven in the middle of a busy city and well worth spending half an hour in. I actually ended up staying for an hour listening to the music â it was so relaxing. Iâve no idea if they advertise when the recitals are happening (it seems quite impromptu) but if they do advertise it, make sure you pop in!
One of the things I particularly liked were the bits of paper decorated with sayings in languages from around the world: true,. They were about Jesus and God etc, but I picked up a couple in Lappish and Swahili (as well as other more obscure languages which looked pretty)!
LISTEN: When Iâve had a day of travelling, I usually want to relax⊠but obviously, I donât want to relax in a hotel or a hostel room because thatâs not what Iâve flown however many miles to see! So, I usually try to seek out a church or a quiet space⊠fortunately, there are some great options in Helsinki if you want to grab some quiet time.
First up: The Chapel of Silence. Itâs a small chapel which look curiously out-of-place in the middle of the busy shopping distract. Walk in and youâll find total silence (well, aside from tourists who donât bother turning their phones on silent. *glares*). The Chapel was built with curved walls and itâs completely serene inside, with a minimalist design and a few candles here and there. Itâs designed to be as quiet as possible and cancels out all the noise from the main street and people outside.
The next lovely quiet place I found was the National Library. Itâs located right next to the Cathedral (another key place to visit in Helsinki) and the inside is STUNNING. You have to leave your coat and bag at the door before you enter, and when you do youâll find gorgeous pillars and an entrance hall filled with old, colourful books. There also happened to be festive decorations scattered around as I was there at the end of November, which made it all the more magical!
Wander into the second room and youâll see spiral staircases leading to more books and if you head right, out of the entrance room youâll find more walls lined with multicoloured books and the photo and video archives with the projectors you need to use to view old newspaper articles! Super silent and slightly dimmed lighting all made for a lovely place to take a breather.
The guy on reception (who looks after your bags and coats) got chatting to me and as soon as he heard my accent, he asked about Brexit (fml). Long story short: the Fins for the most part canât comprehend why weâre leaving, they think weâre doomed and itâs a huge mistake⊠and I agreed with him, of course. Was really interesting hearing from him the popular opinion of the Fins when it comes to Brexit and how their government and media have been presenting the UK as, essentially, in a whole heap of trouble.
Yaaaaay.
LOVE: Iâm putting the public Sauna and the area of Kallio in âloveâ because itâs the kind of area Iâd want to live (and go on dates) if I were to move to Helsinki, and the saunas are an AMAZING way of embracing your body.
Let me explain. Youâll have heard of the Finnish Sauna â saunas are a huge part of Finnish culture and most hotels and homes will have one. These days, theyâre electric saunas (so theyâre warmed up by flicking a switch) and some add hot coals (again, warmed by electricity to start with) which you can pour water on to up the amount of steam and heat in the sauna.
Most saunas and private (hotels, homes) but there are still a few public saunas which you pay a small fee to go and use, and are open to everyone, in Finland. And of the public saunas, most of them are actually part of a fancy spa or hotel. However, in Kallio there is one independent public sauna and, to make it even better and more authentic, itâs a wood burning sauna. All that means is that itâs heated by burning wood in the same room as the sauna which is the traditional way of doing it and it creates a LOVELY smell in the sauna too â you donât come out smelling of smoke at all, itâs just⊠woody. Donât know how to describe it.
Saunas in Finland are a naked affair. Sure, you can wear bikinis, but seriously: whatâs the point. Brits are notoriously ashamed of their bodies and shy away from nudist beaches and the thought of getting naked in public scares a lot of people. However, the saunas are split into male and female saunas and all the women in there are totally chill. Itâs a great way of breaking free of being a prudish Brit and just accepting that everyone has a body, so chill out and get it out đ
When you enter the public sauna thereâs a locker room where you put your things and wrap yourself in a towel. Then, you head into the shower room (you have to shower before you go in the sauna so that you donât have all the grossness of the day and your clothes on your skin when you enter. This is where you drop your towel and get naaaaaked. The nice thing about places like saunas in foreign countries is that no one judges. Women were in there with cellulite, stretch marks and absolutely perfect tanned skin, scars, botched tattoos⊠give a shit.
Then, you walk into the sauna. The heat hits you immediately and you climb up onto the wood steps and take a seat. Or lie down. Yâknow, whatever. I stayed in for about 20 minutes and after about 10 minutes, the sweat was pooouring off me Super sexy. But honestly, it felt great. Itâs oddly satisfying to see literally all of your body sweating and you leave the sauna feeling so cleaned and refreshed, itâs crazy.
Make sure you donât eat a big meal before you enter the sauna and also make sure you drink a good pint of water, because thatâs honestly how much youâll sweat out in about 15 minutes⊠if you donât drink water youâll get dehydrated, dizzy and itâll suck. Donât ever stay in for longer than 30 minutes at a time (minimum 10 minutes to start really feeling the sweat drip off you!) and ENJOY YOUR BEAUTIFUL NAKED SELF.
Canât finish this section on Helsinki without chattinâ a bit more about Kallio. Kallio is well worth a wander â itâs filled with vintage and second-hand shops and itâs pretty much the small-city version of Shoreditch in Helsinki. Lots of trendy cafes and bars are knocking about and good food options too. But seriously, the vintage and second-hand shopping here is the best in the whole of Helsinki, so make sure you dedicate a good few hours to exploring this part of town! You can walk back into the middle of Helsinki from Kallio in about 45 minutes and the walk over the water is lovely, plus itâs a great way to get to know the city better.
Basically, thumbs up for Helsinki. Itâs small but packs a punch and itâs really making a mark for itself against the likes of Stockholm and Copenhagen, the more frequented Nordic capitals. Definitely worth a stop here for a few days as thereâs more to see and do than you may think.
FINALND (Lapland)
Lapland is exactly like the photos. Everything in November is covered in snow and itâs magical as fuck. Reindeer wander about. The roads are so thick with snow you wonder how the hell anyone knows where the road ends and the grass begins. Cold in the day and REALLY cold at night. Trees on trees on trees and all of them covered in snow. Crystal clear sky. And did I mention how bloody magical all the snow is?
I spent 3 days in Lapland and I really wish Iâd spent more. The whole place is so serene, quiet and magical (need to find another wordâŠ) I could have easily meandered through Finnish Lapland for a couple of weeks! But the snapshot I saw is enough to make me want to see more of Lapland sometime soon. Below are my highlights from my time in Finnish Lapland.
EAT: Youâve probably seen that photo above. Itâs of Kakslauttanen and itâs in the middle of nowhere, a resort in Finnish Lapland. As life is short I decided to spend a night there in one of their glass igloos, with the hope of seeing the Northern Lights as I lay in bed. And delicious, gorgeous food. Nom.
Ivalo (ee-va-low) is the gateway to Northern Lapland and I flew into Ivalo airport from Helsinki with Norwegian Air (a quick and cheap flights, would recommend them for this one). As the plane dips beneath the clouds youâll just be awestruck at how WHITE everything is⊠and how despite being covered in snow, the airport still functions (unlike in the UK when 1cm of snow causes Heathrow to go into meltdownâŠ) From Ivalo to Ivalo village itâs a short 1 minute taxi ride, but to the Kakslauttanen resort I got a shuttle bus, which took about an hour.
This is my igloo! It was super cute. When you arrive at the resort, you pick your keys up from a super toasty warm and wooden reception area and you can either have someone take you to your igloo, or you can get a sleigh from outside reception, dump your luggage, and sleigh your way to your igloo. OBVIOUSLY, I chose this option and I can confirm moving all luggage by sleigh is the most fun way of moving luggage EVER.
The igloo I had was a small igloo: it has a toilet and sink and two single beds. Itâs cosy, but plenty of space for two people. As soon as you step inside out of the -14 degree cold, the warmth hits you. At one point when I was getting out of my fleece gear, a reindeer walked past my igloo. I tried to take a photo (above) but failed miserably. (Donât worry, I found more reindeer later)!
Onto the âEATâ portion of my experience. At the resort, a three-course meal and breakfast is included in your stay and the three course meal was incredible. The dining area is beautiful (Iâm not used to staying in fancy places so I was super impressed) and the service was amazing. You donât get an a-la-carte menu, you just have a veggie or meat option. For my starter I had soup and for my main course I had local fish in a mushroom sauce. The fish was divine, as was all the fish I had on this trip, and Iâm really glad I chose it over the chicken option! For dessert I had apple and cinnamon puree with berry cake. YUM.
Attached to the restaurant is the igloo bar (above): if the Northern Lights are out, make sure you grab a cocktail and admire them from in here. I decided I wanted to explore the resort more than have a cocktail, so I wrapped up and sought out Santa. Basically, youâre given a map of the resort and I was able to wander around and see the âwinter bridgeâ, âSantaâs homeâ (if you want to pay extra, you can book to go in and see Santa which for families must be EPIC) and lots other things to see along the way. Thereâs a winter marketplace with lovely carved pillars and surrounded by random candles and lighting. Thereâs also a reindeer paddock (is paddock the right word? Iâm going with it) and I there were some reindeer who came and said hello to me when I wandered over. I felt TERRIBLE because Iâd had my reindeer pizza the day before :-\ On the way back to my igloo (LOVE THAT I CAN SAY THAT!) I passed lots of other festive houses and beautiful lights to make sure people can see in the darkness without ruining the magic. Tâwas lovely.
Back in my igloo, I waited for the Northern Lights to appear, but they didnât. It was a perfectly clear sky though, so I was lucky enough to fall asleep under the brilliant stars and even saw a couple of shooting stars too! I also had the pleasure of watching a car try to drive through 4ft deep snow and get stuck, and have to call a tow truckâŠI preferred having the reindeer for entertainment, but ho hum.
The morning after I had one of the most delicious breakfasts ever: there is NOTHING that they didnât provide here, I swear to god. Fruit, cereals, full English, fish, meats and cheese, toast and alllll the spreads and traditional Finnish breakfast pastries too. Took about three bloody cinnamon rolls for the road (so tasty) and also tried a Karelian pastry too: rye crust with a filling of rice or potato, then coated in butter. I didnât like it that much because I just found it to be a bit tasteless, but theyâre super popular and really filling, so I can get why people devour them in winter!
As a single traveller, it was pretty steep at Kakslauttanen Resort (ÂŁ350 for one night in my small igloo, fml) for a small igloo, but if youâre travelling as a couple, itâs SO worth ÂŁ175 a night. And if Iâd seen the Northern Lights I could have justified the ÂŁ350⊠but without them, itâs an experience Iâm glad Iâve had, but wouldnât pay for as a solo traveller again. Thatâs not to discourage anyone from going: it was a great experience and if you can afford it then give it a go!
SEE: Public transport ainât so hot in Lapland, for obvious reasons. So one E100 taxi later (I know, fml) and I got to Ivalo village. I had a bit of an explore and picked up some food in the local supermarket (by food I mean âmore cinnamon rollsâ) and then headed towards my next destination: Guesthouse Husky!
Guesthouse Husky is about a 10 minute drive from Ivalo village and feels SO remote. Itâs fantastic. The fact itâs so remote makes it the ideal place for seeking out the Northern Lights and, as you can guess, itâs FULL OF HUSKIES. That cute lil pup above was with its siblings outside my bedroom window and thereâs hundreds of huskies at the Guesthouse. I learned so much about them while I was there!
Main thing I learned: huskies are wild dogs. Properly wild: like wolves. The owners of the guesthouse were chatting with me about how they believe itâs crueller to try and domesticate a husky (compared to having them so sleigh rides) because a husky is designed to consume about 10,000 calories per day and run up to about 80k per day. So taking them for a stroll around Hyde Park ainât their dream: running like maniacs around Lapland 100% is. I did lots of research into whether riding with huskies was cruel or not and the overwhelming consensus is that the huskies, genuinely, love it. Which they totally seemed to do when I went for a ride with them!
I signed up for a 90 minute ride with the huskies and thought that I was just going to be chilling out in the sleigh. Turns out, for half of the time, I was driving the bloody things which is actually easier than youâd think. The instructor was really good at letting me know when to throw my weight on the brake (the âbrakeâ is a pad that grips onto the snow to slow the dogs down⊠because they will NOT slow down if theyâre not forced to!) and how to guide the sleigh too. Iâd really recommend doing the husky ride at Guesthouse husky, for a few reasons:
The view. LOOK AT THAT VIEW. You basically spend 90 minutes in the middle of nowhere, whizzing past wild reindeer into the middle of the wild forest thatâs next to Guesthouse Husky. Seriously: that view though.
The guide. My guide was wicked: as everyone else was in a couple (whatevs) it meant I got to share a sleigh with the guide which meant I chatted to him about huskies, Lapland and learned a lot from him. They also kit you out with allll the cold gear (see super sexy photo above) because, guaranteed, even if you think youâre dressed warmly, you wonât be!
Itâs honestly a once in a lifetime experience. You see âhusky sledding in Laplandâ in all the Bucket List travel books and thereâs a good reason for that. Seeing the huskies do what theyâve evolved to do â run like maniac â and doing so through the gorgeous landscape is an absolutely amazing experience.
LISTEN: How can you NOT listen to Christmas songs when in Lapland in November? It’s impossible and madness to try to avoid them. The song below is a fave of mine and I happened to be listening to this just before I headed outside to try and spot the Northern Lights at Guesthouse Husky.
(I did actually manage to see the Aurora, for a few minutes, in Lapland. I saw it far stronger in Iceland, but being in the perfectly still, snow-covered forest ad having that be my first time seeing them was everything I could have asked for. I didnât get a photo as I hadnât set my DSLR up properly, but Guesthouse Husky is a brilliant place for trying to spot them.)
Anyway, onto one of my favourite Christmas songs which will always remind me of this trip.
LOVE: In the UK, snow causes havoc. People like looking at it until they have to get somewhere and then realise the airport is shut, the train is cancelled or itâs not possible to drive anywhere. But in Lapland, everything functions perfectly when it snows and it was such a lovely experience to just roam around and walk through snow thatâs about 2-4 foot deep!
Snow is super romantic. Obviously. And the snow in Lapland was so perfectly white. So powdery that when I tried to build a Snow-Lion I wasnât able to because the snow wouldnât stick together! Itâs really odd that walking for miles through a landscape covered in snow (which is pretty damn repetitive) can be so enchanting. Whether youâre on your own, with your family or friends or with a partner, you can guarantee that youâll fall in love with Lapland very quickly.
I take a photo of my cat, Totty, on all my travels and take a photo of her at amazing places to send back home to Mum. Above it Totty in the middle of a snow-covered forest. STUFF OF DREAMS.
Basically, as you can tell, I loved Finnish Lapland. I just wish Iâd had more time to explore and go even more remote! Cannot recommend enough.
ICELAND (Reykjavik)
Onto Iceland! I flew from Finland to Iceland with Iceland Air and it took about 4 hours from Helsinki. Weirdly, my passport wasnât checked once⊠not when I got on the plane and nor when I got off. Iceland Air seem to have no idea why this happened (dodgyâŠ) but apparently, Iâm now able to travel between Nordic countries with free reign, which is pretty cool.
As soon as I landed in Iceland, I was struck by the landscape and if youâve never been, itâs a place to take your DSLR. There is something wild, stunning and natural around ever corner, I swear to God. I learned a fair bit about Iceland when I was there by speaking to the locals â about Icelandic folklore, its politics and more. I also learned that when people said itâs expensive, they were NOT joking⊠about ÂŁ14 for a bowl of soup with a salad and if you want a pint of beer itâs going to be about ÂŁ10. Much as I loved Iceland, I honestly couldnât afford to go for more than a week or two at a time, despite the fact that my one week there felt like nowhere near long enough.
First stop in Iceland: Reykjavik!
EAT: Just around the corner from HallgrĂmskirkja (the church in the centre of the city) thereâs a little building with rainbow colours and fairy lights. Obvs I was drawn to it like a moth to a flame. Turns out, it was Braud & Co, a DELICIOUS bakery.
I got the above which was an almond and cinnamon pile of deliciousness in perfect pastry, with nuts and seeds on top (which makes it healthy, ok?). They do all kinds of sweet pastries (from cinnamon rolls to toffee buns), as well as breads and cakes.
I donât need to say anything further. Just scroll through their Instagram feed and I dare you not to start salivating.
EAT: Before I visit a city, I always check the cityâs hashtags to see if I can find any food or activity inspiration. Fortunately, I checked #Reykjavikfood and Sandholt has posted a photo of an epic burger. So, off I went!
It took me a little while to work out where the restaurant is: true, itâs on the main street, but Google will try to take you to the Sandholt bakery. The restaurant is actually the building to the right of the bakery and is situated inside the SandHotel and the restaurant is confusingly called Brennda BrauĂ°iĂ° and finding a menu on the hotel website is impossible, so Iâve hyperlinked you to their Instagram account!
At the restaurant I went for the burger, obvs, which came with smoked cheese, pickled cabbage and fried potatoes. As you can see from the above photo, thereâs a lot of it and it really was brilliant. You could taste every part of it, whereas sometimes with burgers a condiment or extra gets lost: not here. As a nice little extra, before my main course arrived I was given free Sandholt bakery bread and butter too (which was also fab).
I wasnât going to have dessert but I spotted this on the restaurantâs Instagram feed too and once I got told the Brennda aprĂkĂłsan had won the Reykjavik dessert of the year, I decided âfuck itâ and ordered it. WHICH WAS A GOOD DECISIONÂ BECAUSE IT WAS DELICIOUS. Itâs basically a small apricot tart, and the apricot is gooey a little sweet (but not too much), some kind of hazelnut crunchy mound and apricot ice cream. Yesssss.
EAT: Basically, you canât go to Iceland without trying lamb or fish. I wanted to go somewhere that was a little off the beaten path and where Iâd be likely to find some locals. Turns out Kaffivagninn was the perfect place â itâs right by the harbour (about a 20 minute walk from downtown) and is known for its fish. Itâs also a really cosy little place and most of the people in there when I went were locals. Which is how you know itâs a goodâun.
They have a happy hour too, which makes the beer a normal price rather than Icelandâs crazy expensive pricing. But the main thing youâll want is the fish and chips. The above was probably the best fish Iâve ever had. SO light and the batter wasnât too oily â nice and light too. It came with fries (which were nice but nowt mind blowing) and three sauces (cocktail sauce, thousand island and tartare).
The staff were also lovely and the fairy lights make it a great place to have meal. Highly recommend!
SEE: HallgrĂmskirkja is the cathedral in the middle of the city and itâs definitely the biggest tourist attraction in Reykjavik. Its design was inspired by the cooling basalt rocks of the volcanos in Iceland and as you get closer to it, it becomes all the more striking! Especially with the statue outside: at dusk, it looks all kinds of impressive.
Itâs one of the tallest buildings in Reykjavik and when I arrived there was a constant stream of people in and out of the cathedral, and a queue for the viewing gallery. But I persevered and went up there anyway!
But first, the cathedral. Itâs a sleek design punctuated with gorgeous stained-glass windows and an epic organ. Seriously, itâs huge.
For a small fee, you can take a lift to the top of the tower and it gives you fantastic views of the entire city. It actually makes you realise just how small Reykjavik is⊠and how colourful! I went up there at about 3.30pm as the sun was starting to set, so it was still daylight, and it was also a bit quieter at this time too, so Iâd recommend leaving the crazy tourists to do it at midday. Well worth a trip up there â and if you can find out when the organ gets played, I bet it sounds just as epic as it looks!
SEE: As soon as you land in Iceland, the landscape hits you. A mix of choppy seas, snow-topped mountains, volcanos and fields of lava rock all welcome your flight in, and once youâre in Reykjavik the mountains are a stunning backdrop to the city.
The best places to see them isnât from the harbour (way too many ships in the way), but actually from the Harpa Concert Hall. The building itself is worth a look around as itâs really striking and the colourful lights that run through the glass are awesome. But, step outside and turn to face the mountains and youâll get some brilliant photos.
See?
SEE: So, the Northern Lights are top of plenty of bucket lists. And theyâve always been something Iâve been interested in seeing (of course), but itâs only over the last couple of years that Iâve been determined to see âem! Fortunately, I was lucky enough to see them three times on my travels: once in Lapland (quite faint though, only last 5 minutes), once when I was camped out next to a thermal energy plant outside Reykjavik (donât ask â again, quite faint) and a third time, when I chased them.
By âchased themâ I mean I took a gamble and went out of my way to find them in Iceland. No, I didnât join a Northern Lights tour. Mainly because all they do is drive lazy tourists into the middle of nowhere and hope for them best â and I ainât a lazy tourist.
First thing I did was find where on the outskirts of Reykjavik was dark and where I could get to using local buses. I opted for the lighthouse which is away from peopleâs homes, right by the ocean and you can get there using the local buses. Ooh, and it has a mini thermal pool next to it which can help to keep you a bit warm! Top tip: download the Straeto app: itâs the local bus service in Iceland and all you need to do is type in where you want to go and itâll tell you how to get there. It also offers the ability to pay for tickets via the app and it shows you where the buses are in real-time (so you donât have to wait in the cold)! Honestly, itâs great and because I did a bit of research a local bus took me straight to the Aurora đ
My experience watching the Northern Lights was mixed. On the one hand YESSSSS NORTHERN LIGHTS! It’s so odd to see the sky slowly and suddenly fill with green, and to watch the green move across the night sky. It falls in and out of nowhere and is pretty damn magical. However, on the other hand I was fucking freezing, as it was about 11pm and I was right next to the sea, so the wind was mental. Hence why my photo has come out so blurry⊠I was shaking too much to take a decent shot!
It really is an amazing experience and just hammers home how incredible travel can be. I mean â sure. You can see the Aurora from time to time ion Scotland and Ireland. But seeking it out and being successful in somewhere as beautiful as Iceland is an experience Iâll never forget. We live in a bloody magical universe. Big love for solar particles.
(To get to the lighthouse in Reykjavik, get the Number 11 bus from the main street to bus stop Lindarbraut / Hofgarðar. It takes about 20 mins from the main street (stop Bio Paradis) to get here. Once you do, walk to the end of the road and turn left⊠then just follow the ocean wall! Be warned that the very last bus back into the centre of the city leaves the Lindarbraut / Hofgarðar bus stop at about 11.20pm. The Northern Lights are brightest from about 10pm onwards, so you still have lots of time⊠all good!)
LISTEN: I happened to be in Reykjavik at the same time as a lady I used to work with â Ceinwen â and I met her and her husband for a drink at a bar they recommended. Turns out it was a brilliant recommendation, so Iâm passing it on!
The bar is part of Kex Hostel. Yes, yes, I know â you hear the word âhostelâ and you think it must be a dive bar. I promise you, it isnât. Itâs a brilliant, stylish bar, decorated with books and cartography and lots of shabby chic furniture, moody dim lighting and fantastic music too. They do âslightly upmarketâ pub grub there too, as well as having an epic range of drinks, including lots of beer on tap. Fun fact: beer was illegal in Iceland until 1989 (no one is completely sure why), and the Icelandic beers are all brewed using filtered volcanic water: so you can be sure that any beer you have will taste extra special.
Kex is the Icelandic word for âbiscuitâ and the hostel is situated in an old biscuit factory. The first time I went there it has laid-back hip hop playing and Ceinwen and her hubby were drinking a red wine they both seemed to completely fall in love with. The bar staff actually gave them the rest of the bottle for free, which is awesome! But the second time I went on my own, I happened to arrive when a jazz and blues band were playing, and it was ACE. The atmosphere was perfection, he surrounding were beautiful and itâs the kind of bar where it really doesnât matter if youâre there as a big group, a romantic couple of a solo traveller: everyone is comfortable and can relax.
Iâd VERY strongly recommend going there if youâre in Reykjavik. Seriously. Good. Bar.
LOVE: For a couple of hours one afternoon, I decided to spend my time with the largest collection of mammal penises in the world. The Icelandic Phallological Museum is an interesting way to spend a little time out of the cold. And, true, if you donât go youâre not missing a huge amount, but if you do have the time to stop by itâs an interesting little (but well hung) place! For example, did you know that some mammalian penises have bones in them? WELL NOW YOU DO!
Dicks. Everywhere. As well as penises belonging to deer, whales, dolphins, polar bears⊠if you can find it in or around Iceland, its penis will be in this building. The exhibition takes about 90 minutes to properly go around, as there are lots of descriptions to read. Youâll also learn interesting facts about phallic culture around the world and thereâs lots of laughs too: various men have left their penis in their will to the museum, and these declarations line the walls! So, someday, homosapien phallus’ will also join the crowd.
In one little room of the museum there are phallic fairy tales and folklore â thereâs even the penis of a merman on display. Yup, seriously. Itâs green and everythingâŠ
The museum is hilarious and well worth a visit. Câmon. You know you want to. If only for the fact the toilet doors have giant penis handles and it has a fully stocked shop too.
ICELAND (South Iceland) EAT: So Icelandic lamb is kinda a big deal. Youâll see official lamb plaques all over the country, so restaurants can show off if they serve the properly amazing authentic Iceland lamb.
I donât usually eat lamb, but itâs such a big deal I wanted to give it a try. (Should point out that according to everyone else I was with it WAS really good.) I had the above at a hotel in the middle of nowhere (seriously) when I was roaming the south of the island, but all of the lamb in Iceland tastes equally brilliant, I was assured by all the locals! Basically, the lambs are totally free range and they live off of grass that grows thanks to water filtered through volcanic rocks. Basically, the lambs are powered by amazing nature and fresh air⊠which makes them taste delish.
SEE: As well as fire and ice, thereâs also some water that moves in Iceland. I visited two of the main waterfalls and yâknow what? Both were ok. If youâve not seen a waterfall before then youâll love âem. But⊠I just wasnât crazy for them. However, this may be because it was winter and they were a little treacherous to explore.
Seljalandsfoss is very pretty in winter and as you walk up to it you walk over a crystal clear stream. When itâs less icy you can walk around the back of the waterfall which is pretty cool â but when I was there it was so icy that you werenât allowed to do it!
The second waterfall I visited I liked more because I was able to climb up to the top of it. Itâs called SkĂłgafoss and itâs only about a ten-minute drive from Seljalandsfoss. Thereâs a stairway to the side of it and if you climb to the top (the climb isnât too hard) and up top you can lean right over to the pool at the top of the waterfall. Itâs pretty cool.
SEE: The glacier lagoon is the stuff of dreams. And, of films. Apparently, this is the place Hollywood comes to film any scene that needs a lil bit of ice (including James Bond and various action movies).
The glacier lagoon is in the South East of the island and itâs a stunner. When I was there SEALS WERE FROLICKING IN THE WATER. It was too much, honestly.
Fun fact: a glacier is a piece of ice that moves under its own weight. An iceberg moves because of the water. A glacier moves because the weight of the ice building on the glacier which then forces the rest of the ice to move.
You can wander around the shore of the glacier or walk up the small hill to look over the whole place. Itâs magical AF. Make sure you go if youâre taking a circle
SEE: Mountains? Whatever. These days, I hike across glaciers. Specifically, glaciers where people have gone missing and never been found (which I was told on the way to SvĂnafellsjökull [the glacier] which was super reassuring).
SvĂnafellsjökull has been used as a filming location for the likes of Game of Thrones and Batman begins which basically means Iâm a hero for hiking it. Youâre set up with crampons (metal spikes that go over your hiking boots), a helmet and a pick axe. Once youâre on the glacier you have about 20 minutes to careeeeefully hike over the muddy part onto the lovely ice. The reason itâs muddy because as the glacier moves, the mud gets pushed to the top of the ice (so the mud is on the outside), leaving just the plain olâ ice in the middle.
I was on the ice for about 90 minutes and the sun setting over the glacier is beautiful. So are the cracks in the ice and seeing bits of the glacier that donât have crampon marks on them (I went all adventurous and made it my mission to explore bits of ice that no one had trodden on). There are little icy steps dotted about for hiking up and down too.
The hike was included in my tour of Southern Iceland so Iâm not sure how much it would have cost to do it â but my mini tour included everything in this âSouthern Icelandâ section and was run by Xtreme Iceland. My tour guide was called Adolf (yes, he hates his name) and he was brilliant! Really down to earth and incredibly knowledgeable. He taught me all about the Icelandic love of swimming pools (seriously, itâs mental), told me lots of Icelandic folk tales and also talked a lot about Icelandic politics!
LISTEN: On the way to the glacier, I stopped off at the black sand beach which was quite an experience. The fact the wind was howling sounds like a total mood killer, but actually it made the whole place seem really spooky: especially when the snow was blown over the black sand! It was really striking and I felt all magical (and cold. It was fucking cold.).
The beach has a few other interesting features, black sand aside. The basalt pillars on the beach are really striking, and either side of them are caves. There are also two famous rock formations in the sea to the left hand side of the beach which make a great photo!
However, the best thing about Reynisfjara Black Sand Beach is the Icelandic folktale thatâs set here. According to legend, the rock stacks in the ocean are actually trolls who tried to drag a boat to the beach but werenât able to do so before the sun came up (which is when they turn to stone). The folk tales of Iceland are brilliant. Thereâs another one about a group of seals who took off their skin and turned human for one night only, then fell asleep after the danced the whole night. A fisherman tool the skin of one of the seals, and in the morning all the other seals had gone but this one human naked lady was left in the cave⊠as the only way she can get back to the ocean is if she has her seal skin.
The fisherman comforted her and took her back to his house. Long story short, he married her and she had seven children with him. He was a dick, basically, and he hid her seal skin for years and years. Until, one day, she went into the locked room and found the seal skin. When he returned, he found her gone and a note saying she had children in the ocean and children on land, but she decided to go and stay in the ocean.
âŠI told that really badly. I promise Icelandic folk talks are awesome when someone competent tells them!
Anyway, back to the beach. Wind howling. Atlantic waves crashing. Cave echoing. Get a-listeninâ!
LOVE: The reason Iâve put Diamond beach in the love category is just because it was such a beautiful place. How can you help falling in love with this place?!
Diamond beach is named so because when the ice leaves the Jokulsarlon Glacier Lagoon (the one I wrote about above) it travels not very far (approximately 100m) out to the ocean⊠but some of it gets caught up on Diamond Beach. Because itâs so cold, the ice takes ages to melt and in the sunshine, the ice really does shine and sparkles like diamonds on the beach!
Because I was there at the start of winter, the sun was really low on the horizon, so it looked like it was setting/rising the entire day, which made the beach so magical. The ice isnât heavy so picking up the crystal clear bits of ice is a must-do (obvs), as is walking along the shore and watching the waves crash around the chunks of glistening ice.
Omg seriously. So beautiful. â€
ICELAND (Other fun stuff I did) EAT: I always ready the in-flight magazines on planes. It kills time and I nearly always pick up an interesting tip or place to visit! The magazine on the Icelandair flights to Iceland was no different: it had a little article on Malt og Applesin.
THIS DRINK IS DELICIOUS. Itâs a Christmas drink in Iceland (their version of mulled wine or eggnog I guess) and itâs crazy good. Basically itâs a malt drink (so it tastes a bit like beer, but itâs non-alcoholic) and itâs mixed with organic. ALCOHOL FREE ORANGE BEER. Itâs so bloody festive and yummy. I had it on the plane, in the bar⊠everywhere, basically. Give it a go if you visit Iceland!
SEE: I have a book by Rough Guides and I use it to inspire me whenever Iâve booked a holiday, or when Iâm not sure where to go. One of the recommendations in the book is to head to Silfra. Itâs a damn good recommendations because in Silfa you can snorkel or dive in lava filtered water between two tectonic plates.
HOW COOL IS THAT?!?!
I went with Dive.Is because you can only go between the tectonic plates if youâre with a guide. You also canât dive unless you have lots of experience, so I opted for snorkelling. Silfra is in a National Park about a hourâs drive from Reykjavik and itâs a fissure between the North American tectonic plate and the Eurasian tectonic plate. Apparently there are lots of teeny tiny earthquakes there everyday, but you donât feel them. Instead, you get to look down into some of the clearest water on earth about 45m into the earth, which is about as amazing as youâd expect!
The water is so fresh and clear because itâs filtered for dozens of years through lava rock before it gets to this point. So if you get a load of water in your mouth, you can just swallow it and feel refreshed. Silfra is also the only place where one can dive or snorkel directly in the crack between two continental plates, which makes it pretty damn special.
The experience was bloody freezing, just to warn you. I went when it was about -7 degrees out of the water and when you get in youâre only in a wet suit, so youâre not kept warm⊠just dry. And even then, not THAT dry because water gets into your gloves. Sigh.
The water was about 1 degree when I was there and the 45 minutes in the water was more than enough. Iâd LOVE to go again in the summer when I could get out and not feel like Iâm going to freeze to bloody death⊠but Iâm still so so so glad I did it. And Iâd 100% recommend DIVE.IS â as you can see, the photos they took of my snorkelling were amazing and the guide was fantastic too!
SEE: As I didnât hire a care, I used public transport to get me to a place called HveragerĂ°i, which is the starting point of my mental day trying to get to the Reykjadalur Hot Springs. I took a little local bus to the bus depot on the outskirts of Reykjavik and then hopped onto a coach which departs every couple of hours and takes you to HveragerĂ°i.
When you get o the start point you see a bit of greenery and immediately steam coming from the water: even at the start point the stream is warm! Youâll also pass some mud pools bubbling away and letting off stream too, which is pretty cool. By cool, I mean scorching hot, so watch your step. Then comes the snow and the iceâŠ
âŠwhich would have been fine if Iâd been properly prepared, but my snow boots have no grip on them whatsoever. So, I managed to get up about 1k of the hill before I slipped backwards, scraped my knee and gave up. Trust me, I had a few falls before I packed in my attempt (as it took me so long to get there!) but itâs up a big old hill and the entire path was just COVERED in packed snow and ice â there was no way I was going to make it.
So, I got a plastic bag out of my backpack, sat on it and whizzed down the hill for 1k: SO Much FUN! True, not as much fun as getting to the top and bathing in a natural warm river would have been, but ho hum. I enjoyed myself and had an adventure, so thatâs the main thing đ If you have a car and youâre properly dressed, give this place a visit. Not getting up to the top just means I HAVE to come back in the summer and give it another go when itâs grassy. Whoop!
LISTEN: Keflavik airport is ok. Nicely laid out, but small. Thereâs a Joe and the Juice in the middle of it and while I was waiting to leave Iceland, it was playing some killer tines. Some of them were Icelandic hip hop! I really liked the song below â itâs by Joey Christ and itâs called Turisti.
LOVE: Last year, the Blue Lagoon in Iceland has nearly as many people visit it as there were tourists entering the country. The reason? Because the Blue Lagoon is super famous and only about 15 minutes from Keflavik airport, so alllll tourists head there as they enter or leave the country.
I went on my way outta Iceland which personally I think was the better way to do it. Airport days are usually a bit meah because you know you canât do anything BIG because you need to get to the airport in good time, so heading to the Blue lagoon about five hours before your flight means you get a solid three hours bathing in its warm, bright blue waters.
The Blue Lagoon, on paper, sounds gross. Itâs supplied by water from the geothermal power plant and it in the middle of a load of lava rock. However: when you learn that the water is beautifully warm and is incredible for your skin (YAY TO GEOTHERMAL POWER!) then youâll start to see the appeal.
The day I went, it was really cold so after taking a shower before getting in (which everyone has to do), I headed out to the lagoon. Itâs actually quite nice walking out into the freezing cold and slowly submerging yourself in the warm water⊠but if you ainât that brave, thereâs a little bit of the lagoon inside which you can get in, and you can swim to a door that lets you outside. But if you bear it, go cold then warm. So good.
It was very steamy when I was there, and the water was perfectly blue. Everyone just looked so bloody relaxed it was ridiculous. I got a basic ticket to the lagoon, which included a mud mask. The mud mask you apply while in the lagoon, you wait about 15 minutes and then you just wash it off in the lagoon â it doesnât make a mess in the water at all! Thereâs also a couple of bars in the lagoon so you can stay warm whilst ordering your beer/wine/cider/etc. When you arrive, youâre given a wristband which you use to pay for everything and they scan the band before you leave. Well smart.
I loved it. Yes, there are LOTS if other geothermal lagoons which are less expensive and less crowded. But this place is popular for a reason: the facilities are great and the blue water against the lava rock covered in snow was pretty special!
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In short: Iceland is stunning. Itâs a natural wonder with fantastic food, lovely people, some of the most spectacular sights and experiences on earth and itâs CRAZY EXPENSIVE. But donât let that put you off â just make sure you save enough to really enjoy yourself đ
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Quick note about the places I stayed, as they were great. In the Lapland part of the blog I went into a lot of detail about where I stayed in Lapland, but the hostels/places I stayed in in Helsinki and Reykjavik.
First place I stayed in Helsinki was the Toolo Tower apartments: basically, university accommodation that they rent out. I didn’t take any photos, but it was in a good location and was basically a mini apartment. Really great value and I’d recommend.
The other place I stayed in Helsinki was Hostel Diana Park. It’s small but really well-kept and in a FANTASTIC location. The rooms were airy and comfortable, the bathrooms were clean and the kitchen area was really nice. Wifi was fast and I really recommend it. Seriously: the location ROCKED.
First place I stayed in Reykjavik was the HI Hostel. It was about a half an hour walk out of the city and to be honest it wasn’t great. The bed was ok but the showers were dirty which sucked. To get to the showers I also had to go down a freezing cold stairway which wasn’t great. Also, the wifi wasn’t amazing either.
For the rest of the time I was in Reykjavik I stayed at the Galaxy Pod Hostel. It was GREAT. Amazing location and every bed is its own little self-contained pod. The pod has charging points, air conditioning and lots of hooks and places to store things. REALLY good wifi too, as well as a locker which auto-locks and is big enough to fit a small suitcase in there.
The hostel also has a brilliant atmosphere: there’s a huge TV in the common area which is hooked up to Netflix and the lounge area is super cool – good lighting, really comfy trendy sofas, etc. The kitchen is well stocked and big too. Showers and toilets are clean (and warm!) and the walls are all chalkboards so you can write messages on them đ
2017 was a pretty good year. Not the best (my best is hard to beat) and nowhere near the worst. Definitely more positives than negatives, which is all you can really ask for, right?
2017 highlights
My friends have had an amazing year which has made me gloriously happy. Olly and Katie, Emma, Lauren and Tom have all got engaged and they all rock. So that’s been awesome. I had a reunion with my Uni mates as we’ve known each other for 10 years and seeing Nat (who now lives in Dubai), my friend Cate is in good health, Nick and Tim have both had epic promotions and my bezzer Jude and I have been to some really cool bars and events in London this year.
My travels have been amazing. I’ve visited Jordan, Kenya, Tanzania, Spain and Denmark with my Nana and Finland and Iceland. I went to Kenya and Tanzania with friends I made on my travels around Africa a couple of years ago, and made some great friends while out there too!
I re-visited Barcelona and Copenhagen with my Nana and Dad, which also rocked. My Nana is 97 years old and she, without complaining or getting too tired, walked about 15 miles each trip. I got her to try new foods, learn a little more about the world and make the most of her free passport †I just wanted to give her some wonderful memories and to show her she’s NEVER TOO OLD TO TRAVEL… and I think I succeeded đ
Jordan has been on my bucket list for years. I actually looked back on this blog to a bucket list I wrote about 5 years ago and visiting Jordan (specifically Petra) was on there. I not only visited one of the wonders of the world, but I floated on the Dead Sea, ate some truly delicious food in Amman and camped in Wadi Rum.
A more recent addition to my bucket list was to see the Northern Lights. I put off booking a November holiday because I had Jury Service (which I managed to get out of via a letter to the judge from my CEO!) so last minute I decided to see Helsinki, Lapland and Iceland. On my way I ate reindeer, I rode with huskies, saw the Northern Lights, hiked a glacier, shivered on black sand beaches and slept in an igloo.
My work. I started the year with a team of three people and I ended the year with a team of eight. And they all rock. I’m very lucky to work with not only people who I genuinely like and respect, but who are also brilliant at what they do. True, the year has had its ups and downs when it comes to client dramas, pitch wins and losses, but all in all I feel happy looking forward to what’s going to come in 2018!
My love life has been… interesting in 2017. And confusing. I’m seeing someone who I’m not seeing and not going on dates with someone I’m dating. Whatever the hell is happening with him, we’ve now been seeing each other for nearly 18 months and he’s been a big part of 2017.
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Other 2017 highlights include:
Finding people to go to Ru Paul’s Drag Race with. YAAAS QUEENS!
Visited way too many brilliant bars with Jude, including one where you have to break secret codes and one where we (I…) drunkenly stole a giant toy lion. (Don’t ask.) Ooh, and went to Evans and Peel at loooong last!
Went to Sketch with the Digi Team of Dreams and Bob Bob Ricard with the mini Digi Team of Dreams.
Discovering Gin and burrata. Yes, I sound so middle class. WHATEVS. They’re delicious.
Seeing the Barber Shop Chronicles with Ryan. SUCH a good play, total theatrical highlight for me.
Touring Highgate Cemetery. I’d wanted to go for ages and the gravestones and architecture generally was beautiful.
My birthday. I had all my best friends come out in Brixton with me and then was treated to a brilliant birthday Escape Room and night out too. Very blessed.
Meeting up with my Mum’s father and partner (my biological grandfather) and then seeing Merry and Noelle again in August!
Meeting Jessy and Zoe – Jessy is a total babe and she actually has dating stories to rival mine!
Chris (my brother) going travelling. So happy he went for it and ended up spending 5 months exploring Asia!
The Lavender fields in Surrey! They smelled as beautiful as they looked.
And the low lights…
Getting my purse stolen in Berlin at the airport and having to spend 2 days trying to find an open Western Union and realising (as I scoured the grass for spare change) that a tramp was doing the same thing. Fml.
I got flu for the first time. I have since had my flu jab because I never, ever want to go through that crap again. Ugh. Double ugh.
Getting soaking wet on a Welsh hillside making a totally pointless video for a client. The blogger I was with was nice though… but yeah, so cold. Not the greatest.
Thinking I might have to move outta my flat. But I didn’t. So alllll good đ
2018 resolutions…
I’m going veggie. It’s something I should have done a while ago and it’s been playing on my mind for a while now. After reading Sapiens (fantastic book) and generally learning more about the farming industry, I just can’t face eating meat anymore. I was going to go vegan, but thought that’s probably unrealistic to maintain, so for now I’ve just swapped cow’s milk with almond milk and imma see how I go… but yeah. No more meat.
I’m 30 in 2018. Which is fine as I don’t have ol’ biological clock-tick that freaks a lot of other women out. But, it’s still a significant milestone and I want to get back on track when it comes to my fitness. I’m taking up weights, cutting out booze and getting myself into the shape I want to be for the rest of my life. Basically: that means getting stronger, losing about a stone and a half (of fat, not muscle) and taking better care of myself. I’m going to moisturise, use body scrub and walk even more than I do now… and do so in proper walking shoes!
A few years ago I made a resolution to leave my comfort zone when travelling. What I meant, at the time, was to travel to more places outside the Western World on my own… so I went to Cuba!
I’m making the same resolution this year too, but I mean it in a different way. I want to challenge myself to have more difficult travel experiences: ones which teach me more about human history and ones which will stick with me. I have so far booked a holiday to Poland to visit Auschwitz and I’m also heading to Cambodia where I’ll go to the Killing Fields. It won’t be fun, but it’s far too important to keep the memory of these terrible events alive so we can learn more these horrific events and make sure the people who suffered are not forgotten.
…I’ll also go to some nice places too, I’m sure.
I want to do something worthwhile about a cause I care about in 2018. I currently give to a few charities, but I really want to take a more active role and give my time rather than just money to causes I believe in.
So, I’m going to see what I can do in the world of animal and environmental conservation, and safe sex education. I’d like to think I can make a tiny difference to both, but realistically I’ll need to do one or the other. On a day to day basis I do small things for the environment and wildlife, but signing petitions and shouting at idiots in my office who don’t recycle paper won’t always cut it. I might actually start social media advertising towards young people trying to teach them about the importance of wearing condoms. We’ll see. But it’s definitely something I want to work on!
I havenât blogged here for about 5 months. Which is super annoying as I use this blog as a diary, so Iâve done a whole heap of stuff I want to remember, but I havenât written about it. The reason? Because I kept telling myself I wouldnât put up a blog post until I finished this one, about my time in Jordan back in July 2017.
But life, work, Netflix, books etc got in the way and now Iâve just returned from another adventure to Finland/Lapland/Iceland. And Iâve sworn to myself that I wonât blog about THAT until I finished off my Jordan post. But, at last, Jordan is finished. Enjoy â both the post and the country!
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Me: âIâve booked another holiday!â
Mum: âOf course you have. Where are you off to this time?â
Me: âJordan.â
Mum: ââŠSeriously?â
Me: âYes, Iâll be totally safe, donât worry. I want to see Petra, one of the modern wonders of the world, the Dead Sea, follow in the footsteps of Lawrence of Arabia in Wadi Rum and the see the oldest surviving mosaic depicting the biblical world.â
Mum: âPlease donât go.â
I had similar conversations with various family members when I said Iâd booked an 8-day holiday in Jordan. True, there are plenty of reasons to think it best not go to Jordan; itâs bordered by Israel, Iran, Egypt, and Saudi Arabia. Oh, and Syria. Syria was the main one Mum freaked out about.
For the traveller though, Jordan is perfectly safe. Yes, theyâve accepted over 2 million Syrian refugees in the last few years and have had the odd terrorist attack in their capital city (thatâs less than London on both the former and the latter), but unless you actively head off for the North of Jordan to the Syrian border or decide to go for a wander in the refugee camps, youâre going to be completely fine. I mean⊠of course you are â it frustrates me that this needs spelling out, but Jordan has been so hugely affected by the drop in tourists visiting that unfortunately weâre in a situation where scaremongering needs to be addressed by stating the bleeding obvious.
So get that terrifying Daily Mail version of the Middle East out of your head and get ready to see one which includes a long and rich history, delicious food, spectacular natural and man-made wonders and some wonderful local people. I went to Jordan with Geckos, a tour company for 18-29 year olds on this tour here. Iâll do a mini review of the tour at the bottom of the post. For now⊠on to Jordan!
AMMAN
I was in Amman for a couple of days on my own, sans tour group, so had lots of opportunity to explore. True, you can only explore so much in a couple of days I tried my damn best.
Amman is basically a series of hills. It is not an easy city to walk. Just when you think youâve conquered the last hill, youâll see some steps which go up ANOTHER HILL. Basically, get ready to walk. Of course, the taxis are cheap in Amman and I got a few when I was with the tour group because they werenât up for walking, but if you CAN walk do, do so. The city has some lovely building and itâs the only way to really see what the people living there actually experience! Plus, Amman seems to have a thing for multicoloured graffiti steps â which are far easier to discover on foot đ
EAT: So Iâm obsessed with knafeh. Obsessed. I had this delicious, sticky-sweet dessert every single day I was in Amman. And when I wasnât in Amman I was thinking about it. And I dragged my entire tour group to Habibah, a dessert shop in Amman, where they sell it.
There are two branches of Habibah in Amman Old Town â one is a standard shop, but one is a little shop hidden in an alleyway with street seating. This is my preference because thereâs always a group of locals and tourists gathered outside, soaking up the sun and indulging in the delicious Palestinian masterpiece of a dessert. It was started by a man who moved to Amman from Jerusalem (the dessert being brought over from Palestine) and the rest is history.
It looks weird, I admit. Basically, itâs a layer of sweetened ricotta and mozzarella cheese bedded underneath a layer of filo shredded pastry which has been soaked in butter before the whole thing is covered in a lemon and rose-water syrup. LOOKS WEIRD BUT SOUNDS AMAZING. And really unhealthy, obvs.
You can get two types of this delicious dessert from Habibah; one with the shredded filo pastry (one above) and one with more tightly packed crusty pastry top and pistachios (first photo). Both are divine and served straight out the pan, scorching hot. A large slice is only 1.40JDR and a small slice (which is still biiiiiig) is only 0.7JDR (thatâs about 75p. SEVENTY-FIVE PENCE. Incredible).
Right, well if my ranting hasnât convinced you to try this then youâre clearly an idiot. Because although itâs super sweet itâs crazy delicious. True, some members of my tour group said it tasted weird (the cheese element put them off) but if you like cheese and sugar like any normal person this dessert is a must. I love it so much Iâve found a decent place in London that makes it (Hiba) and I even made it myself using this recipe! Had to visit a local Middle-Eastern shop to get the pastry (itâs called kataifi) and it actually tasted pretty damn good!
EAT:Hashem is one of the oldest restaurants in Amman. Youâll find it in Lonely Planet, top of Tripadvisor and on all the blogs. However, itâs frequented by locals â more so than tourists still â and the reason itâs such a must-visit is because the food is delicious and cheap.
The food is Middle-Eastern staples; hummus, falafel, flatbread. You walk in, sit down and just ask for hummus and falafel. Donât ask for a menu, there isnât one. Donât ask the price because itâs so cheap it doesnât matter. Youâll get a salad brought to your table, a bowl of 12 falafels, a huge bowl of hummus with plenty of oil and if you ask for it, you can get a bowl of delicious beans and chickpeas too.
The falafels are perfect, which is no surprise as this place is constantly making them and they clearly have the recipe down to an art. The outside is crispy, inside if fluffy and each falafel is yummy AS. You can also get four big falafels which have sesame seeds on them too, but you have to ask for these. (Theyâre worth asking for). The hummus is also great; fresh, tasty and loaded with olive oil (like all hummus youâll get in Jordan and the Middle-East). And like every Middle-Eastern meal, youâll get a bag of flatbread too!
For a bowl of falafel, a bottle of water, a huge bowl of hummus, salad and bag of flatbreads came to 2.40JDR. Thatâs ÂŁ2.50 for an entire meal and water. Itâs insane and itâs a must-visit.
I admit, the service was a shambles but this is only because the waiters speak limited English and because we turned up so late (8pm) so theyâd run out of eggs and everyone had to make a last minute order change. And that meant no one knew what theyâd ordered and paying the bill was a nightmare⊠as I said, just make sure you remember what you order and youâll be fine!
I decided to try some more local specialities so I went for a starter of labneh balls and fresh watermelon juice. The labneh balls are thick creamy balls of yoghurt… so thick itâs sort of like cheese. They come with seasonal herbs and spices and have an interesting taste, more sour than I expected, and are worth trying as theyâre a staple of Jordanian cooking.
This was followed by rose and date flatbread, called taboon flatbread. It comes with sea salt, pistachio and itâs amazing. The bread is cooked so itâs a crispy crust but a warm, soft base. The date and rose topping is sticky and sweet and the pistachios and shredded filo pastry sticks to it perfectly and has a great crunch. I wish Iâd got a whole one rather than just a half!
As well as the above they have the usual delicacies (hummus, falafel and halloumi served about a million ways) as well as some strong brunch options (eggs with halloumi, roasted tomatoes etc etc). One of the gals on the tour also had a rosewater and watermelon drink which was divine, so make sure you donât miss out on that too!
SEE: I did a lot of walking around Amman and you know what I noticed? Painted steps. Everywhere.
These were the first I stumbled across. I was walking from King Abdullah Mosque to downtown Amman and I wouldnât have even noticed them if I hadnât been lost and looking for the right road sign. Theyâre at the top of (one of) the hill out of downtown Amman and it was the first of many. Turns out, Amman has some damn good street art and itâs not confined to just Rainbow Street (the tourist area)!
Close to Paris Square (lots of nice restaurants there FYI, all very al-fresco) are some steps which take you sharply downhill into the middle of downtown Amman. These steps are not noticeable in the slightest at either end. But wander down them and youâll find some lovely cafes and some vibrant artwork.
The artwork above is all along the walk and thereâs a lovely little art gallery, a bookshop and some cafes there too. They were selling plants there too and itâs a nice little diversion which Iâd recommend.
SEE: Along the main street in Old Town is a small doorway. Look inside and youâll see some turquoise steps leading into what looks like someoneâs home. Except, these steps actually take you to The Dukeâs Diwan, the oldest townhouse in Amman which is now open to the public.
Head upstairs and youâll find a calm atmosphere with the open plan living space free to wander around. The man who owns the place has left various newspaper clippings about The Dukeâs Diwan, and why he wants to open it for all to see. This quote from him really got me: âIn order to appreciate modern life, we have to be aware of where we came from and how things wereâ.
The Dukeâs Diwan is beautifully tiled and offers fantastic views from the balcony of the hustle and bustle of downtown Amman below. If you head into one of the side rooms you can also look down on the people eating delicious knafeh from Habibah on the street! (Hopefully that will help give you some indication as to where the entrance to this townhouse is.)
You donât need longer than about 20-30 minutes here, but itâs a worthwhile diversion. You can see what the inside of the townhouses lining the streets looks like, learn about Jordanian history and get a lovely break from the streets as you relax back into one of the chairs on the balcony. Warning â there is a toilet here which doesnât work, no refreshments are on offer and although itâs free entry be a decent person and give a donation. After all, you just got to wander around the oldest townhouse in Amman for free. Câmon now.
SEE: My hotel in Amman was right next to King Abdullah II mosque so I had to pop in and see what one of the largest mosques in Amman (and the whole of Jordan I believe) looks like. Although Iâm atheist, religious buildings always instil a sense of calm in me and theyâre usually beautiful places to take a few moments to relax. Plus, Iâm a firm believer in not judging a book by its cover, so a visit to the home of the Qurâan was a must as I admit, my understanding of Islam is more limited than Iâd like it to be.
There are 5 pillars to Islam, each interpreted by Muslims in different ways. Some put more focus on one particular pillar, for example. The five pillars showcase just what a peaceful and compassionate Islam can be.
Pillar 1: Ramadan. Muslims undertake this fast for a month each year so they can empathise with people who do not have the money to buy food. They want to better understand those who are not as fortunate as them. Which is a remarkable and wonderful reason for fasting, in my person opinion.
Pillar 2: Pilgrimage to Mecca. Muslims are expected/encourage to make pilgrimage to Mecca at least once in their lives. It is an immensely holy site for Muslims, located in Saudi Arabia.
Pillar 3: daily prayer. Muslims pray five times a day: sunrise, lunchtime, afternoon, evening and night. They do so facing the direction of Mecca. In every Jordanian hotel room and restaurant there was a sticker which I didnât understand for a few days. Then I realise the sticker was showing you where Mecca is, making it easier for people to pray.
Pillar 4: Charity. Every Muslim must give a portion of their monthly income to charity, or those in need. If they do not have money or an income, they can do this in other ways; volunteering or donating their leftover food, for example. Another pillar I have a hell of a lot of respect for.
Pillar 5: Declaration of faith and belief there is only one God Allah. In order to become Muslim you have to say âthere is no god but God and Muhammed is the messenger of Godâ.
I learned all this by speaking with a lovely lady in the shop underneath King Abdullah mosque. You have to enter the mosque outside of prayer time (so between about 8am â midday) and she told me virtually all women who visit arenât covered up enough. I went in trousers, shoulders covered and a scarf round my head and she laughed and said my body shape canât be visible at all, hence the silky hooded number below that I had to put on in 90 degree heat (fml).
Onto the mosque. I took my shoes off outside and stepped onto the intricately decorated carpet, only one other worshipper in there so it was completely silent. The lights are arranged in a circular patter too and they work beautifully with the ceiling. Make sure you head up to the walls and look at the ornate patterns there – the place really is beautiful and relaxing.
Finally, go and look at the Qurâans. They are gorgeously decorated.
SEE:The Citadel in Amman overlooks the entire city. Itâs a solid hour walk to the top of a very big hill in very hot weather, but I like a challenge. I was running out of cash at this point so I opted not to go for a guided tour of the place â but I wish I had now, as there was clearly a lot I was missing from just gazing at the ancient pillars and ruins. Thereâs lots of guides waiting at the entrance, so just pick one up with you arrive.
Once up there, the main highlights are the Temple of Hercules and the Ummayad Palace (above) â but thereâs certainly way more than that to look at! Artefacts from the Bronze Age can be viewed at The Citadel and thereâs even a cave (which you can go inside) from the Bronze Age, around 2250 BC. ITâS A WELL OLD CAVE. It feels all mystical to be in there and know that the black bits on the ceiling of the cave were from when people who lived thousands and thousands of years ago had open fires in the cave. Mind-blowing.
The Temple of Hercules is above. The Romans invaded the Arab world and the Emperor at the time built this in about AD 170. Aside from the grand Roman pillars that are still standing, you can also see âThe Hand of Herculesâ: a giant marble hand which belonged to a statue of the Roman God, before an earthquake destroyed the majority of the building.
A lot of the buildings on the hill were ruined by various earthquakes, but their ruins and the museum located on the hill alongside them, are absolutely well worth a visit. Their rich history aside, you can also see the entire city from up here and an impressive view of the Roman Threatre (below) which has a secret stairway leading from the hill straight there). See if you can find it yourself without having to ask the guide!
The Theatre itself costs a small amount to enter (canât remember how much but it really wasnât much) and if youâve been to Italy or Greece, youâll have come across a lot of these types of theatres. However, Iâd say itâs still well worth exploring and if thereâs a show/gig on in the city there it would make an absolutely INCREDIBLE place to spend an evening. Seriously, they still use it to put shows on. So cool.
LISTEN: It got to about 10pm one night and the rest of group were done for the night (or were drinking in their rooms). So I decided to take an Uber (theyâre illegal in Jordan, but still widely used and Iâm still alive to tell the tale, so all good) to Ammanâs first (and only?) jazz and blues cocktail speakeasy bar.
The bar is called Off The Record and itâs super cool. You rock up to a hotel and thereâs a gate. Head inside the gate and a small entrance on the side will take you to the bar. Itâs a prohibition-era style bar with lovely lighting, an exceptional playlist and a fantastic cocktail selection.
Soooo sexy. Obviously picking up a date in Jordan isnât quite as simple as London, so I went to this place on my own, but it was pretty quiet and the staff were nice so it wasnât a problem. Note: people were smoking inside. Thatâs still a gross thing thatâs a-ok to do in Jordan, so youâve been warned. I went for a vodka-based cocktail and settled down to listen to the music.
Ella Fitzgerald. Sinatra. Nine Simone. The classics were all there and there were plenty more tracks played which I didnât recognise but absolutely loved. Honestly, if youâre a jazz and/or blues and/or soul fan, this place is a great choice. If youâre there alone, the music is the perfect accompaniment to a good drink. Itâs the PERFECT date spot too. For a great end to your evening (or start yâknow, yâall donât have to be as dull as me heading to bed at midnight!) then this is a great place to go. True, itâs a little out of the way, but the best places are, right?
LOVE: Ok, so itâs not âloveâ really, but I wanted to note down that Amman is a place where you can walk about in respectful western clothing and youâll be totally fine. I always wore trousers or a skirt that came below my knees and ran into no trouble at all, not even when wearing a strap stop.
However one girl on the tour (she wasnât the sharpest tool in the shed) decided to wear denim short shorts into the middle of Amman Old Town. Unsurprisingly she got a lot of negative attention and she was actually groped too. True, she shouldnât have been, but she was also completely disrespecting the culture of the country.
/\As covered as you need to be. Basically: if you donât want to cover up, donât go to the Middle East. However, if you donât want to miss out on an incredible part of the world, treat the culture of the country with respect. Thatâs the way a traveler, not a tourist, acts. You only need to be covered from head to toe as a woman when entering mosques, and most mosques will give you something to wear anyway. So long as you have down to your knees covered, and your boobs arenât show, youâll be fine.
WADI RUM
EAT: So throughout Wadi Rum are Bedouin camps â traditional lodging where you can sleep under the stars in the desert with Bedouin hosts. Wadi Rum has been inhabited since prehistoric times and on entering the desert we stopped off for lunch in the middle of nowhere, which happened to be next to a rock with Thamudic inscriptions (thousands of years old and a language that hasnât really been properly studied yet) which is pretty incredible.
The Bedouin have lived in the desert for thousands and years and the local Bedouin now make their money by organising activities in the desert for tourists and setting up camps for people. It was horrible to hear from my Bedouin host that due to the issues with Syria, their numbers have plummeted and most of the Bedouin in the area are struggling to get by. They offer amazing insight into the desert and the history of the Bedouin culture, well worth experiencing!
Their insight includes showing you how the Bedouin cook in the desert. Itâs called a âzarbâ and is basically a Bedouin BBQ! Basically they created huge holes in the sand and putting the coals under a tiered tray system. Then, they submerge the trays into a pot in the sand and cover it with sand. When it re-emerges, your meat and vegetables ad potatoes and deliciously cooked. Due to the fact itâs slow roasted (it takes a couple of hours in the sand to cook) the meat and veg is SO flavoursome. Yum.
SEE: I mean⊠thereâs a lot of sand, but Wadi Rum is more than that. Whatâs so striking about Wadi Rum is the rock formations soaring out of the sand and dominating the landscape.
A few highlights of mine were: hiking, with great difficulty, up this giant sand dune. A couple of my group got boards and tried to board down the dune, but it took a fair bit of effort! Views and the rich colour of the sand was amazing though.
Wandering alone through the desert for an hour. Honestly, itâs so peaceful. I just left the people at camp and wandered around. The shadows cast by the rocks and stepping across sand with no footprints was pretty magical.
Watching the sunset from the top of a fucking huge rock. Had to climb it, obviously, which was slightly treacherous, but totally worth it. The colour of the sky paired with the colour of the desert below was to die for.
LISTEN: I mentioned before how eerily quiet the desert is. Wander away from your campsite and youâll hear nothing. Possibly the rustle of the wind against the sand, but thatâs about it.
A highlight of the experience for me was laying for about an hour just looking up at the stars as the sky is crystal clear. Look for long enough and youâll see shooting stars too (managed to spot two, whoop)! Itâs also warm enough to stay out in the dark for a while before heading to bed, so take the chance to relax and just stare at the sky. (Donât sleep outside though, otherwise desert snakes might come getcha!)
LOVE:Â This view. Seriously though: look at it. Swoon.
PETRA
Sometimes you hear so much about a place that when you get there it can seem very underwhelming. The Taj Mahal is an example of this happening to me recently: donât get me wrong, itâs incredible, but I think if you hear something is a Wonder of the World, you have absurdly high expectations for building.
Petra meets all expectations. The place is astounding. Created between 200 BC â 200 AD by the Nabateans, it came to be as it was a key point in the Middle Eastern trading routes. But, it went undiscovered for thousands of years and the Western world came to hear about Petra only about 100 years ago when a Western historian was taken to Petra by a local⊠and the rest is history.
Well, history that is still be uncovered and theyâve barely scratched the surface of. They believe that only about 5% of Petra has been uncovered, and even at this stage there is plenty of explore over the course of two days!
I spent two days in Petra and managed to see virtually all thatâs there to see. Petra is split into about 5 key routes: On the first day I saw the key sites along the main route through Petra, and took the climb up the steeeep hillside to get to the Treasury look out point and on the second day I did the 30k hike around the back entrance to Petra and climbed up to the Monastery. Two days is enough to spend in Petra (but Iâm positive if youâre a keen walker you could find enough to fill three days). My highlights are below.
DAY 1: the main sights
To even get to the start point of Petra (the Treasury, basically) you have to walk for about 30 minutes through a narrow crevice, called The Siq, â sometimes only 2m wide, sometimes more like 5m. This is really shady and keep your eyes peeled â carved into the walls of The Siq youâll spot horses and human figures, pillars and more.
Included in your entrance ticket is a free horse ride through the crevice. Donât. Take. The. Horse. Ride. Just tell the drivers that you want to walk. Not only are the horses treated badly (and therefore by using them you feed demand for them) but youâll miss so much too. Seriously, WALK. And look around! And once youâve been walking for about 30 minutes, almost out of nowhere, comesâŠ
The Treasury. Itâs immense. I mean⊠it really is. The area just outside the treasure is busy with people taking photos and random horses and camels milling about. Youâll also see people praying next to the walls of the Treasury if youâre there at prayer time and if you get up close you can look down into the below-ground vaults too. A few years ago they closed off the entrance to the Treasury because tourists are terrible and they were messing it up, so youâll have to gaze from outside. Itâs not actually the biggest temple in Petra, or the most technically impressive, however the fact it appears from nowhere to greet you just makes it so immense.
Walk around the Treasury and youâll spot various Royal Tombs tombs and then youâll come across am amphitheatre â opposite which is the Street of Facades. Itâs a line of tall, impressive tombs which overlook various refreshment stands and local artists stalls. You can climb up and actually go inside these tombs, so definitely go and have a look!
Eventually, youâll see a Bedouin tent and from in here, you get a spectacular birdâs eye view of the Treasury. And thereâs refreshments to purchase too. And cushions. AND SHADE. Totally worth it.
DAY TWO: the backstreets of Petra and The MonasteryÂ
Ok, so in the map above youâll see an orange walking route, one which looks like it goes into the middle of nowhere. I walked that route. And it was by far the highlight of Petra for me. Itâs a pathway with a few signs to keep you going in the right direction, and because itâs so long (about 15k!) and more hidden, youâll meet barely any other tourists along it. I, seriously, met about 6 other tourists the entire time.
Along it youâll see the place of Sacrifice and this also offers you another immense birdâs eye view of the main street of Petra. Thereâs also a Jordanian flag up there for you to take a photo next to, obvs. I also passed a lion waterfall (epic), lots of different tombs and you also get to see the home of the Bedouin. Basically these holes in the rock are where the Bedouin people lived, and still live today. When Petra became a UNESCO World Heritage site, the Bedouin were told to leave Petra so it could be preserved. However, some of them have just ignored UNESCO and still live in the rock caves today.
At the end of the trail, youâll come back to the end of the main street leading through Petra and youâll see the street with columns lining it and the old Palace (now partly ruined). Stop, get a drink and then realise youâre at the start point of your next adventure⊠the steps to The Monastery.
If youâre not a great climber, or the thought of walking for about 8 hours in one day doesnât appeal to you, skip the back street trail and just go straight to The Monastery. Basically: donât miss the Monastery! Itâs bigger and far more impressive then The Treasury â itâs about 50m squared! – and itâs situated right next to some amazing hills, from which you can see Israel and the surrounding mountains.
IT IS HARD TO REACH THE MONASTARY. Itâs about 800 steps in total and you need a good long hour to get up there, if youâre fit. Itâs a little unforgiving too â not that much shade, although various stalls line the way where you can get ripped off for clothing (honestly, ignore the clothes sellers on your way up) and water/Coke etc. Thereâs lots of beautiful things to see on the way up though, the steps aside â one of which is a lovely tranquil spring about half way up.
Whilst youâre up there, you may as well climb a bit further and youâll find other temples, caves and âThe High Placeâ â basically a viewpoint where youâll be over 1000m above Wadi-Arabia, with stunning views of the surroundings.
Ok, Iâm done fangirling about Petra now. But, honestly: itâs as spectacular as you think it is and well worth a visit. Like⊠if you go to Jordan and DONâT visit, youâre mental. Just sayinâ.
EAT: Thereâs a battle going on in Petra. A TripAdvisor battle. The number one rated restaurant in the area at the time I visited has reviews by people who have new accounts and have only reviewed this place⊠so it seems the number one spot has been claimed by fake reviews. The then number two is now number one again (WOO) and itâs called Deretna My Mum Recipe (catchy, eh?) and was itâs far and away some of the best food I had while I was travelling. Ignore Tripadvisor. Listen to me, and go to Deretna My Mum Recipe.
In Petra everything is expensive due to the tourist. Makes sense. The food is a mix of Western and Middle Eastern, with some restaurants even having an alcohol licence (I went to one and if you sit outside they canât serve you alcohol there so I had to drink beer poured into a Petra tourist mug â see above). But, if you want delicious Jordanian food and you can live without booze, go to Deretna My Mum Recipe.
The restaurant is a family run affair the staff are SO lovely. It has a small outside dining area and itâs right next to the mosque, so you can hear the evening call to prayer ringing out as you dine. The menu is affordable and so so good. Even their freshly made juices and milkshakes are to die for, but they really come into their own on the savoury dishes.
We were given complimentary bread, oil and herbs which is pretty standard in Jordan, and the herbs are always the same too: totally delicious. However, at Deretna My Mom Recipe they just tasted so much better. You dip the bread in the oil and smother the herbs onto it, giving you a delicious appetiser before the main meal rocks up.
I ordered Mansaf for my main meal. Itâs the national dish of Jordan, so obviously had to give it a go. According to my guide is had by families on special occasions (kinda like roast dinner in the UK). It consists of roast lamb usually, but I switched this out for chicken, layered on top of rice which is in turn layered on top of a thin layer of dough. The main even is the fermented yoghurt sauce that you pour all over it to get the rice to clump together: Mansaf is eaten by hand in the traditional style of the Bedouins, so you use the sauce to get everything to stick together, the layer of dough to pick everything up with.
It tastes amazing. Iâve actually found a couple of places in London that do it, but the portions Mansaf are cooked in are HUGE so I need to find someone to go with before I can take it on in the UK. If you go to Jordan, itâs an absolute must-try. I had it one other time in Amman and it was nowhere near as good as this version.
On top of the beautiful prepared dish of Jordan, because my tour guide comes to this restaurant every time heâs in Jordan (oddly I was the one who recommended we go there â he didnât suggest it because he thought weâd want alcohol LOL) we got given free dessert too! We had the sweet sticky balls of dough called awwamat. Lovely stuff and my entire meal only set me back about ÂŁ10. Go, and then review the place so we can keep it at the top spot on TripAdvisor where it belongs.
LISTEN: For some reason, the call to prayer in Petra was particular lovely. So melodic and almost hypnotising, hearing the call was regularly a highlight as I travelled throughout Jordan. But yeah â Petraâs won, hands down. (Sorry King Abdullah II mosque in Amman!)
LOVE: Again, dating was not something I got up to in Petra. No no no. BUT: howâs a 2000 year old cave for an amazing date location? Or, yâknow, just casual drinks with friends. It claims to be the âoldest bar in the worldâ, so itâd be a crime to miss it, even if youâre just in Petra for a day trip!
The Cave Bar is at the very entrance to The Siq, so when youâre leaving Petra for the day, pop in. The restaurant/bar has been put inside a 2000 year old cave and you can still see things carved into the walls of the cave in the bar area. It does cocktails at a slightly pricey price (câmon, itâs the oldest bar in the world) but is well worth a visit.
DEAD SEA, MADABA AND JERASH
EAT: I now officially love Shawarma. Before Jordan, I lumped Chicken Shawarma in with kebabs â something you get as an unhealthy snack. But in Jordan, they are diviiiine. I had a few, but my favourite was from the Darma Take Away, in Madaba.
Mmmmmmm. Chicken Shawarma is basically where chicken (or whichever meat you go for) are seasoned and placed a spit and cooked throughout the day. It gives the meat SUCH a rich flavour, a smokey yummy taste and when tabbouleh and fresh salad is paried with it and rolled up in Levantine bread, itâs the best.
EAT: The Jordanian side of the Dead Sea is accessible via one of the many hotels around the shore, some which are nicer than others. The hotel we used was nice, but I saw no more of it than the restaurant (buffet included in the ticket) and the swimming pool. Including a buffet in the ticket was a lethal idea because we were all hungry (yay to buffet) but all about to get into our swim stuff (boo to buffet).
(Photo from here because I ate the Om Ali too fast to take a photo of it….)
However, thanks to the buffet I did discover Om Ali, an amazing Egyptian coconut and pistachio dessert which is sort of fluffy and filled with sultanas, hazelnuts, biscuits and bread. Itâs essentially a bread pudding filled with gloriousness. Itâs actually quite easy to make at home too!
What I particularly like about Om Ali is the legend behind it. Apparently, Om Ali was the first wife of a sultan and when the sultan died, his second wife has a dispute with Om Ali (his first wife and therefore the most important) about which of their sons was going to be the next Sultan. Om Ali killed the second wife and to celebrate made this dessert. What a totally epic bitch, right?
SEE: The Dead Sea is one of the oddest experiences Iâve ever had. In a good way, but also in a way which means itâs not necessarily Iâd go out of my way and do again, despite loving it.
The Dead Sea is about 40% salt and this is because itâs a closed off body of water â it can flow in from the Red Sea, but thereâs nowhere for it to flow out to, so it just sits and evaporates, leaving a very salty water base behind. They estimate that due to the drilling in the southern part of the Dead Sea by both Israel and Jordan, that it may not exist within 50 years. At present, the water level drops over 1m per year as it is, meaning itâs likely to be gone within our lifetime.
The healing properties of the Dead Sea and infamous and are partly due to the fact itâs the lowest place on earth, around 400m below sea level. My water bottle compressed on the drive down to the sea and apparently and the combination of salt and sea level mean that the minerals in the Dead Sea are fantastic for the skin.
You can pay an extra 5JD to cover yourself in Dead Sea mud before you go into the Dead Sea and wash it off. Itâs worth doing for the lols alone, but itâs fantastic for your skin (when I washed it off, honestly, my skin had never felt so smooth)!
Once youâre covered from head to toe, you head down to the beach. The beach appears sandy, but the closer you get to the waterâs edge, you just see salt. Itâs really bizarre and oddly beautiful. Itâs also BOILING HOT so youâll want to get in the water sharpish.
When youâre in the mud starts to wash off you and when you get to about chest-height in the water, your legs are slowly forced from under you. Itâs not possible to drown in the Dead Sea as the salt means you float, whether you like it or not! Itâs really strange trying to put your legs back down, and trying to tread water but not being able to. You can seriously take a book and just float around for a while with no fear of the book getting wet.
Couple of things to be aware of though; salty water STINGS. Itâs inevitable youâll get it in your eyes, so wear goggles. I didnât and it was horrible, I was blinded for about 5 minutes as I tried to flat to the waterâs edge to get my towel, but like a salty eye bath, all of a sudden my eyes just clearer and were fine⊠but only after hurting like fuuuck. Also, what you might not get told is that your genitals (itâs worse for women than men apparently) will also feel sore and sting for a little while after you get out of the water. This happens even if you havenât shaved recently (DO NOT SHAVE BEFORE YOU GET INTO THE DEAD SEA), so just be prepared for your eyes to hurt, your punani to hurt and for your skin to feel amazing.
SEE:Â The Madaba Map is a Byzantine mosaic map of the holy lands and can be found in the town of Madaba on the floor of the Church of St. George, a Greek Orthodox church. It dates back to around 500AD and it is the oldest surviving map of the Holy Land. It covers the Mediterranean down to Egypt and across the main body of the Middle East, with the most detailed part surviving being Jerusalem. I love maps, so perhaps this is why it appealed to me so much: the history there is incredible.
What isnât so widely publicised is the miracle painting in the church. I overheard a guide leading a woman into a small room at the front of the church (to the right of the altar) and in there is a painting of a woman who has one regular hand and a blue hand⊠or at least, thatâs what you think.
What *apparently* happened is that the painting of the Virgin Mary and Child suddenly had a blue hand appear in it, from nowhere, in a church service. Rather than this being a fib and someone just painted it on there, the local people decided it came from nowhere, was a miracle, and it was God âlanding them a helping handâ. Either way, take a peek at the supposed miracle while youâre there! Madabe is on the way to Petra, or a short detour if youâre heading to the Dead Sea from Amman.
SEE: Loving the Byzantine mosaic theme? Of course you are. Well, I have another one for you. Youâll recognise âMount Neboâ as the place where God showed Moses the Promised Land (and then told him he couldnât have it because he was going to die. Not cool God). But Mount Nebo itself has more to offer than the tale of Moses â thereâs an incredibly detailed, gorgeous Byzantine mosaic located on top of the hill too. Also: IT HAS A LION IN IT. Which makes it epic.
On top of Mount Nebo youâll find the famous sculpture (below) which gives a good old photo opportunity and the serpent represents the serpent created by Moses in the desert and the cross⊠well, I donât need to explain that one to you. It also offers lovely views of the âPromised Landâ too. Even if the religious significance of this place means little to you, the Byzantine mosaic is wonderful. So something for eeeveryone. Well done Jordan.
SEE: Last, but by no means least, we come to Jerash. When I arrived I sent a text to my Mum: âVisiting the Roman ruins in Jerash – âm only half an hour from the Syrian border.â Hahahaha. Went down a storm.
While to Westerns that sounds scary, itâs totally not. Jerash is split into the âNew Townâ (where people actually work and live) and the Old Town, where youâll find the ruins of a Greco-Roman settlement, which is actually quite well preserved (especially compared to the likes of The Citadel in Amman)! Even if youâre not a huge fan of either history of archaeology, itâs an impressive site to visit if you get the chance and have a little longer to spare in Jordan.
You enter the ruins through the 2nd century archway (Hadrianâs Arch) which is amazing condition. One problem â thereâs quiiite limited signage here, so might be a good idea to get a guide. Next, youâll find a hippodrome where you obviously need to take a photo of you pretending to look at chariot racing. Then, youâll walk towards the main entrance to the ruins and once youâve shown your ticket (and purchased some water â itâs a huge site!) youâll enter the Forum (a curved space with columns still well preserved).
You can easily spend half a day here (think I was there three hours) as thereâs even more to see: temples (the Temple of Zeus is particularly awesome), a theatre or two and a âbalancing columnâ â this located to the far West of the site at the Artemis Temple and basically itâs a huge pillar that moves⊠seriously, put a coin in there and youâll see the column moving. Sâall safe, donât worry!
Summary
That, my friends, is Jordan. Well, bits of it. I feel that spending a week there was a good amount of time to see all the major tourist attractions and to spend a decent amount of time in Amman too. Sure, with two weeks it would have been perfect and I could have done the country through and through.
I went with Geckos, who do tours for 18-29 year olds. At the upper end of that scale, I admit, it was tough going being with a bunch of people in their very early 20s, but I knew what I was signing up for. My guide was nice â a lot like an embarrassing Dad who made bad jokes and kept asking if you were ok (but thatâs no bad thing, bless him) and the tour was generally great value for money and well organised. No major complaints, aside from the tour guide being a bit lopsided (not helping us speak with the locals as well as I felt he should have done) but itâs a minor thing and it didnât ruin the tour or anything!
Long and short of it is, Jordan is a perfectly safe country if youâre going with a guided tour or a group. I got a fair bit of attention when alone and Iâm not sure Iâd want to deal with that allll the time, so I wouldnât jump at the chance to visit Jordan solo. But, Iâm sure I would have been fine if I did.
Highlights were absolutely discovering the delicious dessert of knafeh, the delicious Jordanian local dish of mansaf, completing a 35k trail around Petra and seeing allll the sights, getting muddy at the Dead Sea and watching the sunset in Wadi Rum. All in all, an amazing experience.
Before I get into what I did in Tanzania, I want to make sure I don’t forget the little things I learned while I was there. Namely the following:
Tanzania used to be called Tanganyika. When the country gained independence in 1964, it incorporated Zanzibar into it and so they changed the name of the country to Tanzania to reflect Zanzibar’s inclusion!
They also speak Swahili in Tanzania, but it varies in pronunciation and local words. For example, in Kenya and in-land, you pronounce ‘j’ the same as you do in English. However, in Tanzania (Mainly Dar Es Salaam and Zanzibar) it’s pronounced as a ‘y’.
Zanzibar is 99% Muslim. This is because Zanzibar used to be the hub of the East African slave trade (I went to the former trade market while I was there). Of course, the British were involved in the trading of slaves but it was mainly the Arabs who had control of the market. So, this meant that the Arabs brought their religion with them and when they married local women or enslaved local people they became Muslims. (That’s a very crude telling of the story, but it gives a bit of context I hope!)
Onto my trip!
Arusha EAT: The trip from Kenya to Tanzania consisted of the Tucan Travel big yellow truck. Last time I went to Africa with Tucan I travelled in Peeky⊠this time it was Tom, but amazingly Timan was the driver again! Me, Donna and Alex were obviously overjoyed to see him and it was great to sit up front in the truck and chat about life, the universe and everything with him đ
After crossing the border (after stopping for lunch on the side of the road and doing some good old flapping!) we ended up, 5-6 hours later, in Arusha. As Timan wasnât going any further with us (booo) Kim arranged for us to have dinner at Snake Park where Timan was staying. Not only was it lovely to spend a little bit more time with Timan, but Snake Park put on an epic meal too!
Of course, at Snake Park you can camp and play with snakes⊠but itâs the travellerâs bar and the food which got my attention. We had a magnificent barbecue put on for us with beef, chicken, coleslaw, gorgeous potatoes and ugali, salad⊠honestly, it was an amazing meal. They even put on home-made garlic bread which was so strong and yummy that the mosquitos kept well away (and the men, hah).
The bar at Snake Park is a bit special too. Lots of traveler’s have decorated the place with mementos, t-shirts, photos and more. There are plenty of cocktails, beers, ciders and more available and itâs just a great place to hang out with other campers and make new friends. True, itâs a 30 minute drive outside of Arusha town centre, but itâs close to the airport and worth popping in if you have the time!
SEE: On the way to Arusha airport youâll pass the Cultural Heritage Centre and itâs well worth leaving for the airport an hour early to spend a bit of time (and inevitably money) here.
The centre is a mix of small shops, eateries and am art gallery. Itâs this gallery which is the highlight; I spent over an hour wandering around the five floors of stunning artwork and sculptures here. I completely fell in love with various pieces of artwork and SO much of it was wildlife based so obviously I bloody loved that too.
Thereâs also photography, furniture, animal sculptures and ornaments in the gallery. Most things are for sale and shipment to your home country can be arranged. I spend $15 on an A5 painting, done in the traditional stick figurine style; itâs filled with deep reds and yellows and the black stick figures with bright clothing are just beautiful.
Worth a wander round, if only for the calming water feature if youâre skint!
LISTEN: I wanted to go somewhere local in Arusha. To spend the night in bars and clubs where the people who actually live in Arusha go. And, fortunately, I managed to do exactly that.
The manager of the hotel I was staying at, James, came along with me and my friends and we started the night in Triple A. Itâs a trendier bar which has live music and shows football. And, of course, sells Konyagi.
Oh, Konyagi. Itâs sort of like gin (but itâs not) and a little bit like vodka (but itâs not) and nothing at all like rum. But itâs just as strong, cheap and everyone drinks it with soda water. And itâs SO easy to drink⊠it really shouldnât be, but it is.
Anyway, long story short me and my friends had way too much Konyagi and at about 10pm we left Triple A to head to Sky Lounge, which is far more like a club. To get there we were led by two local guys (who we sort of knew) down a pothole road to a car. Then about 7 of us got inside said car and drove for 10 minutes to Sky Lounge. I KNOW. I donât do shit like this in England, Iâm far too fucking sensible. The problem with everyone drink driving in Tanzania is 1. Everyone does it. 2. Because they all do it theyâre actually quite good at it. To the point where, despite sitting across the knees of two people in the back of a very small car, I had a comfy ride to the club and got there safe and sound.
Thatâs me, dancing to dancehall in a local club. Iâm dancing with James, the manager of the hotel I was staying out. Dear GOD that man could dance. He didnât even walk around the bar, he just glided around it, moving like nothing youâve ever seen. Turns out heâs VERY into his music and he DJs, so dancing is âsecond natureâ to him. To be honest, I was pretty honoured he spent the night dancing with (ok, not with, âup againstâ) me because he was so damn good he could have swaggered up to anyone in that place and made an impression. (Like I said, I do far better in Africa than I do in London â must be the whole âbeing blissfully happyâ thing.)
Anyway, we spent the night dancing to dancehall and contemporary African Rhumba and it was a brilliant night. Aside from a guy, literally, dragging me over to his friend every 10 minutes (that got old fast) and another man filming me dancing (security guard told him to âleave the muzungu alone and delete the video, hahaha).
Again; if youâre with someone you know (or just people youâve met recently on your tour who you trust) then people wonât cause (much) trouble â like you, everyone just wants to dance!
LOVE: If he loves you, Amarula. If he lusts you, Konyagi đ
Serengeti / Ngorongogo Crater EAT: So, I spend 3 days on safari in Tanzania and on day 1, we drove to the Ngorongogo crater. We passed through to get to the Serengeti, but on the way back spent lots of time here (see âseeâ below)!
Tucan run the tour via third-party operators, so itâs not actually Tucan taking you on safari, but one of their partners. So, we had a small truck take us into the Serengeti and on the way to our campsite we saw SO MANY LIONS. But again, Iâll come on to the lions later. What I want to chat about now is the food.
As well as a driver, the third-party tour operator brings a chef on safari with us, so we had a packed lunch everyday (usually chicken, boiled egg, sandwich, banana, cake and chocolate). In the evenings, when the sun had gone down and we were back at base-camp, we had a meal cooked for us. The best cooked on safari?
Cucumber soup. SERIOUSLY. It was amazing. Sounds totally rubbish, I know, but honestly, the spices and the way the Tanzanians cook just makes everything so delicious. The cook honestly couldnât understand why the hell I was asking him for a recipe, haha. The last time I went to Africa I actually used the campsite hobs (basic, but they do the job) to make rosemary sweet potatoes and fish, which at the time I thought was an amazing achievement. But the chef not only made soup, but beef stews, spiced rice with vegetables, fresh COLESLAW and more. Makes you realise and appreciate that the most basic ingredients can create tasty meals.
Again: show the cucumber soup some love. And the delicious food we also had cooked for us by the Bee Eater Safari chef!
EAT/SEE: I hate early mornings. Anyone who knows me knows that if you wake me up before Iâm ready to wake up you will get a pretty damn nasty look from me. However, I was up at 4.30am one morning in the Serengeti and I couldnât have been happier. Why? Because I was about to embark on a hot air balloon ride.
To get on the ride in the AM, you must have signed up and paid (gulp) around $550 the day before to guarantee a place. The ballooning company will come to your campsite within the Serengeti at 5am to have you at the balloon for 5.30am. Thereâs a bit of mooching about with your fellow passengers as the balloon, and pilot, get ready. While this is happening you stand in the middle of the Serengeti and watch as daylight creeps in to cover the moon, ready for the safety briefing to begin.
To start, you get into the balloon basket and the balloon is tipped upright. And then; take off. The Serengeti is a spectacular sight from the ground of course, but from the sky? Itâs not hard to understand why âSerengetiâ translates to âendless plainsâ – the beauty of the National Reserve stretches on and on and on. From the sky you get to see the animals interacting in a way you couldnât comprehend on the ground; I saw a lion leaving itâs kill and skulking off the road to the grasses. About 50m along the road, a hyena was waiting for the lion to disappear (as youâll know, hyenas are natureâs greatest scavengers). While all this was taking place, vultures were soaring alongside the balloon and circling the kill the lion had just left.
From the air you get the understand the sheer size of the zebra and wildebeest herds too â I went in early April, so they were starting to group together for their great migration and we saw hundreds of animals grouped in one spot. We soared over a closed-in rock formation and managed to spot two lions hiding in there too! After about an hour, we landed and made our way through the grasses to the vehicle waiting to take us to a full champagne breakfast in the Serengeti.
On the way to the breakfast location (a beautiful spot under a baobab tree of course) we passed some lions⊠and then only drove about 200 meters away to the breakfast table. Slightly unnerving for the rest of the people in the balloon (one kid asked if the lions would come to get his bacon, haha) but I would have been SO up for lions to join the party!
The breakfast was a brilliant end to something Iâve been meaning to tick off my bucket list for a while. Sipping champagne (lol, ok, it was clearly African prosecco but ho hum) and having a full English breakfast in the Serengeti, before heading back to my campsite, was a brilliant way to spend a morning. Yes, the cost is steep, but the experience is totally unforgettable. The reason I work is so I can do things like flying over the Serengeti in a hot air balloon and I couldnât recommend it enough!
SEE: The Ngorongoro Crater is a stunner. Or, to be more historically accurate, itâs a huge cauldron-like depression in the land which was created when a volcano collapsed into itself around 2-3 million years ago. The crater is 100 square miles⊠which gives you some indication of how crazy huge the volcano must have been!
We went through the Ngorongoro Conservation Area to get to the Serengeti, but stopped off at a stunning viewpoint beforehand. You can see the full expanse of the Crater from this point and itâs stunning. Only elephants are really visible from this height, but the greenery surrounding the vast expanse of water in the centre of the Crater is breath-taking. I was, obviously, on the lookout for lions and I convinced myself that Iâd spotted one under a tree in the middle of the Crater. My group actually thought I might be right, but our driver quickly got his binoculars out and confirmed that I was looking at a bench. My spotting skills ainât that hot.
Two days later, after the Serengeti, we made our way back to the Crater and camped before we heading into the depression itself. As you can see from the photo above, it was super early and the mist and sunrise were pretty damn lovely, even if it was another early morning! You make your way into the Crater by a one-track road which skirts the edge before leading you into the middle. When youâre down there itâs amazing just how much wildlife lives there; flamingos lined the waters edge, hyenas were lying in the middle of the road chilling out, elephants and all kinds of birds strolling around. We even spotted, JUST about spotted, a rhino down there!
Oh, and lions. YAAAAAY MORE LIONS. The lions we saw were quite something too. The first was a mum and her cubs, hiding by a rock in the middle of yellow and purple wild flowers. The mother did what everyone was hoping and sidled onto the rock and surveyed the land, before joining her cubs again, whose heads kept popping up and down between the flowers. SO CUTE.
We also spotted a male lion out and about majestically lying down next to a stream. Iâm always drawn to water (the sound brings me so much joy) so having a running stream behind me as I gazed at a lion was pretty much the dream! As well as meeting a man via a radio chat (see âLOVEâ section) that gives you flavour of my time in the Ngorongoro Crater. It truly is a stunning place.
LISTEN: In the Serengeti, there are three options: basic campsites with toilets, fancy campsites with toilets or actual buildings to sleep in. Obviously I was in a basic campsite, so I crawled into my tent at night and tried to get to sleep. Of course, hearing a lion roar tends to make sleeping difficult⊠and hearing it roar so loudly youâre sure itâs only a few steps away is both completely exhilarating (I like things that have the potential to kill me apparently) and incredibly unnerving.
However, I got to sleep.
The next morning (the 4.30am balloon morning) I woke up before everyone else and made my way to the toilets. After putting my clothes on, I started to walk back to my tent and as I did, a hyena crossed my path and stopped. Like⊠10 meters away. A proper, legit hyena. Now â they donât really tell you what to do if you meet a hyena. So I stood completely still and wondered if I should be worried or not and after about 5 seconds, decided I probably should, but that moving was also probably a stupid idea.
The hyena sauntered across my path, glanced at me and moved swiftly on. So, there you go my friends â if you meet a hyena, treat them much like the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park and donât move. Worked for me, so assuming itâs sound advice.
LOVE: Tinder is only really used in big cities across Africa. However, I was set up on a date thanks to the âAfrican version of Tinderâ â that is, the radio system the safari guides use to communicate with each other.
Basically, I saw this guy at the Ngorongoro Crater campsite and decided he was hot and looked like Donald Glover (a.k.a Childish Gambino). Had his swagger and dressed a little like him too. The next morning when we were on safari in the crater, I spotted him and realised he was a safari driver and I told my group about my little crush. Then, things spiralled.
It was basically like the most embarrassing high-school set up ever, but taking place in a crater on safari. My group were not only looking for wildlife, but every bloody vehicle that went past was surveyed in case he was in it. It didnât take long for the driver of my 4×4 to get wind of my crush, and I told him that the guy is hot and looks like a celebrity.
Long story short, my driver RADIOED ALL THE DRIVERS IN THE CRATER and found the guy I had a crush on and then RADIOED HIM DIRECTLY and got him to meet us at a mini-lake in the crater. Of course, their entire conversation was in Swahili so I had no idea what this driver was rocking up to the lake expecting. Super awkward doesnât cover it.
When he arrived I turned the sass on and pretended this is a totally normal way to meet people. Their first thing he asked was if he could see a photo of the celebrity he looks like (fml). I showed him, he agreed and then we chatted a bit more. Kim, my tour leader then invited him out with us that evening and gave him her number, and mine, so he could get in touch. She also took the above photo where I look like Iâm playing it cool but I COULD NOT HAVE BEEN LESS COOL.
So there you have it. African Tinder. (In case youâre wondering what went on with the guy he tried to skip coming on a night out with me and my friends and just tried to take me straight back to his place. I didnât go and he spent the 2 weeks after I came home Whatsapping me photos of lions he saw on Safari. Which was actually quite sweet, bless him.)
Zanzibar: Stone Town Final stop on my tour of East Africa is Zanzibar. From Arusha we headed to Arusha airport (mainland Tanzania) and the airport was one of the cutest little airports Iâve ever seen. It was even smaller than Zimbabweâs Victoria Falls airport (and thatâs saying somethingâŠ) and then I saw the plane.
The plane we took to Zanzibar was a propeller plane which seated about 20 people and wasnât big enough to have a hold to put the suitcases in. Everyoneâs suitcases were stacked in and outside the one tiny toilet on board, and there was no door to the cockpit⊠the pilots were just sat in full view. Iâm not scared of flying so really enjoyed the experience!
Zanzibar is an island just off the coast of Tanzania. In the 1960s, when East African gained independence, Tanzania was actually called Tanganyika. Zanzibar became part of the country (although to this day it has its own government and operates alone in various maters), so they changed the name to Tanzania so Zanzibar got represented!
Anyway, brief airport story and history lesson over. Onto Stone Town, the capital city of Zanzibar!
EAT: On the seafront is a restaurant called Monsoon. Itâs one of those places that true, is less local and more touristy, but I only had a few meals in Stone Tour and to be honest, the food was great so HERE I AM BEING A TOURIST.
The restaurant has an outdoor terrace (when we got to Stone Town it was unbearable muggy so we sat outside fanning ourselves constantly) and inside the restaurant is covered in rugs and cushions and you have to remove your shoes and sit on the floor to eat. They also have local live music a few nights each week which I didnât get to experience, but my tour leader Kim said itâs really good.
The menu is filled with Swahili cuisine; itâs not cheap but itâs not a super high-end restaurant either. I went for a three course meal for what was about $15 and for the quality of the food and the setting it was a lovely meal. First course I went for chicken and passion fruit dressing with chapati (above). With the humidity it was a great light meal and really tasty too. Definitely getting passion fruit involved with chicken salad in future.
For my main course I had Swahili curried chicken (lots of spices, but not hot), chapati, beans, spinach, potato and a mango veggie bit on the side. The chicken was delicious (put coconut in anything and I’ll love it) and the food was just generally yummy. The photos really don’t do the food justice – it was really good and my photography skills aren’t up to much with the above.
For dessert I had Swahili date cake, baked with dates and cardamon with a bit of vanilla. Also very nice, but a tiny bit dry from what I remember! Worth a shot if you want to eat on a lovely terrace with the sound of the ocean to accompany you.
SEE: One morning I went on a walking tour of Stone Town which I totally recommend. Stone Town is a maze of alleyways, each bursting with history (and, honestly, if you donât go on a tour you just get lost. True, this is a BIG part of the fun of Stone Town, but a guided tour to start you off is a good shout).
Our tour guide was a right character. He learned English from a cockney, so he kept dropping in a London accept to his tour, as well as cockney rhyming slang and lots of British colloquialisms! Total legend is below.
Things Stone Town is famous for;
Being the birthplace of Freddie Mercury. Spoiler: his house looks like a house.
The doorways and architecture. The doorways in Stone Town are STUNNING. Iâm a fan of architecture and I generally love colonial towns because of the mix of influences on the architecture. A few examples of the doors I spotted are below, and on the tour I learned that the things carved into the doors have meanings. For example, doors which had vines carved into them were ususlaly the homes of people who traded crops or owned plantations.
The slave trade. Zanzibar was the hub of the slave trade off the coast of East Africa and saw Arabs coming to East Africa, taking people from their homes and selling them into a life of hard labour lacking in freedom or dignity. The photo above is a sculpture that actually uses a chain from the slave market itself.
You might not be surprised to hear that a tour of the old slave market is both shocking and humbling; what East African (all African) slaves endured is beyond our comprehension. However, at the slave market, and the photo above is where they would keep up to 80 slaves. 80 people in that tiny space, having to sleep, eat and go to the toilet in there, and stay in there while they were either waiting to be sold or waiting to be transported.
Thereâs an exhibition at the Slave Market too and itâs so worth taking 90 minutes out of the midday sun and heading inside here. The lives of both slaves and slave owners are documented here â everything from the lives of East Africans before the Arabs and Europeans invaded, to how slaves were captured (and subsequently tried to escape), the labour and other jobs they would have to do, their day to day lives⊠itâs thorough and worth reading everything in there. Youâll come out into the sunshine from a very dark place in history.
The food market is a tourist hot-spot and the place where locals actually go to get their food. Itâs quite the experience! I entered in the fruit section and was hit but a riot of colour⊠and then I spotted red bananas, which I totally didnât realise were a thing! Theyâre like yellow ripe bananas, but smaller and far sweeter. Delish.
Then, you walk through the meat and fish market. You can tell the meat and fish is fresh because, eerr, you see stuff being chopped and carved up, with blood going everywhere and the place STINKING as you walk through. The fish section was particularly fragrant⊠not a spot to go if youâre either veggie, vegan or sensitive to any strong smells! The cats were bloody loving the fish guts spilling on the floor though đ
On the walking tour we also went to a few famous buildings in Stone Town. The first (above) is called the House of Wonders, named so because it was the first building in Zanzibar to get electricity and it was the first building in East Africa to get a lift! It was built for the second Sultan of Zanzibar dontcha know.
The Old Fort pretty much does what it says on the tin (well fort-y), but is worth a wander for the amphitheatre and to see the walls of the fort, which are made with a mix of limestone and coral.
Also make sure you pop across to Beit-al-Sahel. Itâs now a museum but used to be Sultan Saidâs home back in the nineteenth century. Itâs worth a tour for the history of the Sultan, his wives and to get a sense of the Oman influence in Zanzibar. Plus, thereâs some kick-ass furniture, a beautiful retro bathroom and a life-size painting of Queen Lizzy 2nd in there too (tâwas a gift to the island when she visited back at the start of her reign).
The best bit of the walking tour? The walking. Through the narrow streets, getting lost, discovering some lovely boutique or just seeing the local women cooking their breakfast chapattis in the morning sun. I stumbled across plenty of beautiful street art, decorations and just poignant items whilst wandering. Some, but nowhere near all, are above.
LISTEN: The rains in Africa are wanted and welcomed. Usually the rains begin In April, but for the first 13 days of my 14-day tour, we had glorious sunshine. Which is great for tourism, sure, but ruins the crops and means animals donât have the drinking water they need. But when a storm comes, it comes down HARD.
The storm started as we were on our way back from North Zanzibar to Stone Town. When getting out the vehicle, we got absolutely drenched despite being outside for about 10 seconds. The rain was coming down so hard I wasnât able to take a day trip to Prisoner Island because the boat would have filled up with water in the time it takes to get there apparently!
Or something like that, anyway. Letâs just say that Iâll always remember mango lassi, Omar Zanzibar, Public Enemy and this line: âI like baseball, movies, good clothes, fast cars, whiskeyâ and you. What else you need to know?â
Zanzibar: Nungwi
You canât head to Spice Island and not go to a Spice Plantation. Seriously. I know, I know, all the tourists do it, but itâs well good and you should go. (If that didnât convince you, read on, I promise youâll be convinced.)
The tour involves walking around the spice plantation and learning about each of the things that are being grown there. I ate / sniffed / walked through everything, from lemongrass, tumeric, vanilla, cinnamon and more. The lemongrass was SO fragrant, and everything you were allowed to eat just tasted so much better having it straight from the source.
I also discovered Bilimbi and tried it for the first time (that’s the thing in my mouth in the photo above). It’s a REALLY sharp and sour fruit – honestly, with every small bite I was wincing, but it was mouthwateringly good and I couldn’t help but want to eat the entire bloody thing.
As obvious bloody tourists we got pounced on by various men working at the plantation who tried to see us everything from fragrant necklaces, bracelets made out of plants and one guy was selling beautiful perfume, all made from ingredients grown on the plantation. I went for the Jasmine perfume and a few people in the group got some gorgeous smelling soaps.
Then, we got to taste the fruit grown on the plantation and the teas made with the spices there. The guy in the left hand photo casually climbed a huge tree to get us some fruit (honestly, his climbing skills were insane) and we had delicious fresh pineapple and other fruits (photo on the right). SO YUMMY.
We finished off the tour of the spice plantation by being very kindly invited into the home of one of the women who lives on the plantation. She cooked us a meal (above) of coconut chicken, with spiced rice (including cinnamon, cardamon and more) with fresh coleslaw. It was one of the best meals I’ve ever had. Seriously. The flavours were insane and I ended up having three portions and I’ve since tried and failed to make it at home. Absolutely incredible stuff.
EAT: Most of the places to eat at Nungwi Beach are restaurants which are run by hotels along the beachfront. Now, the food in these places is nice. But you canât help but be super aware that itâs all tailored to tourists and more expensive that the little local places which give you a real taste of the place.
I was wandering along the beach and happened across a little wooden shack. To look at it, youâd only notice the clothes hanging in a shop underneath it. But I looked closer and noticed steep wooden stairs (basically a ladder) to a ramshackle terrace, with a counter underneath. There, you’ll find Lisa Cafeteria.
The food was delicious. Like⊠so good. Such amazing value for money and the fact that itâs not cooked to order, itâs just cooked because thatâs what they wanted to cook that day, really came through. Just good food with a beautiful view.
Itâs a tough place to find, but hopefully the link to the rough area itâs in on Google maps will lead you to it, if you choose to go. Be prepared to eat whatever happens to be available; I donât doubt for a second itâll be delicious.
SEE: Most people who go to Nungwi, understandably, just lay on the beach. Fair enough. These days, I have no problem at all wandering around in a bikini, but the beach is never going to keep me entertained for long. So, I decided to wander into Nungwi village.
I was really glad I did. The road into Nungwi Village started off, obviously being full of local shops catering to tourists. But if you walk 20 minutes you start to see the village itself. The kids get more and more interested in you the further you go outside the tourist zone. I had one little girl and her friends start to follow me and they were speaking Swahili. I asked someone what they were saying and apparently they were asking why a white person was wearing such colourful clothes loooool.
Whilst wandering I found a little local shop selling LION PRINT TOPS (got one, obviously) and a square filled with men just playing draughts and cards. I grabbed a drink and was invited to watch, before starting to wander back to the beach.
At the beach, I decided that I wanted to get out the sun but didnât fancy the beach. So for about $15 I got an hour long massage and it was AMAZING. There are two Muslim ladies who hang out by Nungwi Inn and they do everything from henna and hair braiding to massages. Seriously, the massage was great. Relaxing music and just enough pressure. I have it on good authority that they actually offer happy endings to men, so if thatâs your kinda thing then you know where to go⊠(best I got was a sly boob massage which was more than enough, hahaha).
SEE: The Indian ocean. Well, ‘see’ might be the wrong section for this because rather than just looking at it, I’d recommend going in it. Beach porn below.
LISTEN: Nungwi beach is lined with hotels. Each of the hotels has an offering â they either focus on seafood and cuisine, watersports, themed nights or parties. The Nungwi Inn, where I stay, is now famous for its Friday night party. They extend the bar well onto the beach, have huge speakers set up and locals and tourists alike (mainly locals to be honest) come along and dance.
The dancing is absolutely incredible, of course. While sipping cocktails on the beach the night before, we noticed that a lot of very attractive local men suddenly appeared and were doing a mixture of dancing, volleyball or press ups. My tour guide explained itâs because wealthy older women basically hire the men as gigolos, so itâs pretty much them advertising themselves as the sun sets, so they can attract an older woman for the evening.
I mean⊠if I was at an age where I needed to pay for attractive men (and had the inclination to do so, obvs) then Iâd have been spoilt for choice.
As it was, the local studs who hadnât been picked up by an older woman and had the night free all came along to Nungwi Inn to dance and down Konyagi. The dancing was, of course, amazing. SO so good. Of course, when Kim and I were drunk at about 1am we decided that we wanted to join in and ended up trying to keep up with the guys by the blaring speakers (and failing, but they were nice about it)!
The Nungwi Inn played a mix of music â Sean Paul appeared, as did Swahili hip hop â it was a great mix and a lot of effort is put in to the party, for sure. It goes on until about 2am, when everyone usually goes to bed.
Kim and I did not.
LOVE: Rather than going to bed, we were taken down a rubble road to someoneâs house. We had some guys pay for us to get in and we were led into an apartment complex set up with lights, speakers and all the Nungwi locals dancing in a courtyard.
Now, I know that dancing under the stars is a romantic trope (and to be honest the way the guys were dancing was more of a grind than anything romantic). But thereâs something about just being outside, in the warm air, under the beautiful crystal clear stars of African that you canât beat.
All I did that night was dance with the locals and drink Konyagi (and take advantage of Kimâs hospitality haha), go to a local party (2am), then go to a localâs garden (3am) then go to the foundations of a guyâs house that he was in the process of having built (4am, long story) then wander down the beach (5am). Doesnât sound like a special night but thanks to the people I was with and the beauty of simply being in Zanzibar, it was an amazing evening.
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And that brings me to an end (itâs taken me 2 months to write bloody blog post but reliving my time in East Africa has meant itâs not a chore)!
So many amazing people. So much Iâve learned. So many marriage proposals. So much Tusker. So many unforgettable experiences. Iâm always the best version of myself whilst travelling, and in Africa this is truer than anywhere else. Iâd already fallen for Africa, but I loved Kenya and Tanzania so much Iâm now learning Swahili and planning a trip back within the next couple of years!
My head may be back in London, but my heart is very much still here.
Oh, Africa. Itâs a continent that you either visit once and donât return to, or it gets under your skin and you have no choice to but explore it more. For me, itâs the latter. I couldnât be more in love with the place; the history, languages, the people, the food, the views, the wildlife and more.
This time around I explored Kenya and Tanzania/Zanzibar. Thereâs so much to learn about; the history (how the Brits screwed both countries over), the change in culture (traditional Maasai vs modern life), the language (Swahili, I have decided is my favourite language in the world)⊠and of course, thereâs the animals. OH HAI LIONS.
I went on an organised tour (this one by Tucan Travel) and it was epic. It visited all the main places I wanted to see in two weeks and included 5 safaris, some of the most spectacular scenery on earth, beaches, historical walking tours (sounds geeky, donât care) and loads of opportunities to explore on my own and have wild nights out. Which I did.
Below are the main stop-off points of my tour, what I did, ate and saw there and more. Enjoy! AND FOR THE LOVE OF SIMBA, GO!
Nairobi
Nairobi. Usually called Nairobbery but I had no bad experiences there at all. Despite the fact that for the 2 nights prior to my tour I stayed in âOld Townâ â a place that Google would have you believe is incredibly dangerous. Itâs not. Itâs a fantastic snapshot of real-life Nairobi and while staying in that area I didnât see a muzungu (white person in Swahili) for two days. It was GREAT. I also saw many variations on this poster below… really wish I’d called up and met with one of these Doctors. Just for a laugh, but I’m sure it would have been quite the experience…
I walked from Old Town to Westlands (an hour in the dark) and again, had no problems. If you go somewhere thinking youâre going to get in trouble, then you might. But walk through the streets with your head high and try and speak the language with the people who live there and youâll usually be fine Iâve found. True, I was there with two friends this time (a man and a woman) but I spent enough time walking around Nairobi on my own to know that no trouble was going to come my way.
EAT: I havenât mentioned her much so far, but my Tucan Travel tour leader (Kim) was epic. She was so up for taking us to interesting places and fully embracing being in Africa and making the most of it. She actually visited London a couple of weeks back and I took her to a trendy al-fresco Brixton street food / bar place, a little like one she had taken me to when in Nairobi. The main reason she took me there was because: burgers. Câmon, as if I could go to a country that has agriculture at its heart and NOT have a burger.
We went to The Alchemist (near to Quik Fit in Westlands, Nairobi) â itâs basically got a few food trucks there, lots of seating and a huge DJ / dance area. We sat down and ordered Tusker beer (obviously) before browsing the Mama Rocks menu. Mama Rocks started in London before the founders moved their delicious burgers to Nairobi â and they were seriously delicious.
I went for the chicken burger; Peanut crusted suya-spiced chicken breast, crispy lettuce and fiery chili, coconut mayo. It tasted as good as it sounds, trust me. The peanut spiced coating was crispy but not overpowering and broke away perfectly leaving you with delicious tender chicken to get at. Coconut mayo is also my new favourite thing. It all worked together gloriously⊠pair this with the plantain fries and youâre onto a total winner.
Only downside of the evening was it TIPPED DOWN. Like, heavens hardcore opening. So we had to finish our meal, smiling and not giving a shit about the weather. Because when youâre in Africa, the rains are a good thing!
EAT: I read a short piece on Nyama Mama in the Kenya Airways in-flight magazine on the way to Nairobi. Not how I usually get my food tips when visiting new countries, but in this case it was a brilliant shout. Nyama Mama is reasonably new and is in Westlands, just off the super-highway. It plays to what I mentioned earlier â about East African traditions and modern life coexisting â and all of the food uses traditional Kenyan ingredients but served with a contemporary twist.
First up; the ugali fries (in the back of shot). Ugali is a stodgy food, like thick starchy rice and is a staple of the Kenyan diet. It bulks up meals and is usually pretty tasteless. However, Nyama Mama turned ugali into âfriesâ, sprinkled them with paprika and served them with garlic sauce. They were completely delicious.
I went for Mama’s Matoke burger (no more burgers, promise) which consisted of plantain (matoke is another word for it, basically), cheese and chermoula which I discovered is a paste which is made of herbs and earthy spices. The bun wasn’t fantastic, but the burger and extras totally were!
Oh, and I had to have the meal with Tusker. Tusker is Kenyaâs best-selling lager and it has a yellow elephant on the label which immediately makes it better than ALL UK BEER (plus it tastes nice too). It was actually the creation of two British brothers in the 1920s â the British government were âencouraging investment in the coloniesâ and two brothers came over and started brewing. One brother loved hunting and on a shooting trip got killed by a male elephant (SERVES YOU RIGHT DICKHEAD) â and male elephants with huge tusks are called⊠YES. TUSKERS. So, the surviving brother named the beer Tusker in his honour and the rest is cold, refreshing history.
I bring back a beer bottle from every country I visit, so this bad boy is sitting on my beer bottle shelf at home (500mls because in Africa they donât faff about with 330ml bottles). If you go to Kenya, you canât miss having a cold Tusker. Mwah.
SEE: Iâd never done yoga, but it seemed easy. Bit of stretching, bit relaxing, etc. Before I went to Nairobi I came across the Africa Yoga Project. The AYP is captialising on the explosion and increasing investment in the âwellness industryâ and is training out of work Africans to become yoga teachers â itâs a really smart idea. So, where better to try my first yoga session than in Nairobi?
Obviously I rocked up wearing colourful cotton leggings, no sports bra and a stupid top and I walked from the centre of Nairobi to the yoga studio, about 45 minutes in the lovely midday sun (fml). So I was already warm. Once we started the session, it took about 2 minutes for me to realise the following:
1. Yoga is really hard.
2. I am not that bendy.
3. You sweat a LOT doing yoga. Especially when it’s 35 degrees.
The instructorâs assistant could tell I was crap and spend half the session trying to bend me into the right position, which he did in a way which helped me and didnât make me feel totally incompetent. The instructor I had was in the middle of training, but was really good. He made it really clear what I needed to do and catered to all abilities. As the instructor was being trained, the session was âpay what you wantâ too. If you like yoga, or want to try it, then definitely visit this place. Youâll be funding a brilliant project AND sweating like the African rains (but maybe thatâs just me).
SEE: While in Nairobi I did make the effort to do some hardcore tourist stuff. First up was the Elephant Orphanage. Itâs about a 20 min drive from central Nairobi (near the National Park) and itâs only open between 11-12.
When you get there, you queue up and then are welcomed into a roped off area. All of a sudden, youâll see the baby elephants come bounding towards you from the distance (they keep them in as close to a natural, open environment as they can) and once they get to the roped off area they lunge at the feeders who are waiting with milk for them. SO CUTE.
Most of these elephants have lost their parents in the wild due to natural causes or poachers. Some of them were abandoned by their parents because they couldnât survive in the wild (one baby elephant has a limp because he was shot in the leg) but in the orphanage, they are free to roam, given milk and have allll the mud and water to roll around in they could possibly want.
Next on the well-beaten tourist trail is the Giraffe Centre. You may have heard of Giraffe Manor â it costs a LOT of money to stay there and itâs a hotel where the giraffes stick their head through the windows / ambush you on the patio / generally get in the way (nicely). Well, the Giraffe Centre is next to the Manor and the same giraffes hang around waiting for tourists to feed them veggie pellets. Again, theyâre free to roam; if they decide they donât want food, theyâll wander off and you canât do anything about it.
But, like most animals, they always want food. Basically, they slobber all over you and look really cute doing it with their huge, blue tongues. If you want to get up close and personal with giraffes, this is the place to do it.
SEE: I went to the Karen Blixen Museum without really knowing who she was or what she did, but having heard that itâs a place not to miss if youâre in Nairobi. Turns out, she wrote Out of Africa (Iâve never seen the film but have since read the book) and sheâs a pretty extraordinary woman!
A tour of her farm starts with a guide telling you all about Ms. Blixen. She moved to Africa in the early 1900s from Denmark with her husband. While in Africa she got a divorce from him (UNHEARD of back then?!), ran her own business (she turned the farm into a coffee plantation), she lived with her lover for about 10 years (extremely sassy 100 years ago) and she was a writer, a painter and acted as a nurse to the local people while she was here. You get to tour her farm grounds, the house and see some Out of Africa highlights⊠but learning all about this immense woman is the real highlight. I left with a bit of a girl-crush.
So much so that I went straight to a bookshop in Nairobi and purchased Out of Africa. I’ve now finished the book and, colonial mentality aside (she shoots animals and obviously is a white woman who just purchased some ânative landâ for herself) but her heart is generally as in the right place as it could be for the time. The way she views Africa is the way I do â a place like no other and gets under your skin. The way she describes the landscape is beautiful and she honestly wants to help (as in with their help and offering employment, learning about their culture. Not the colonial version of âhelpâ which is take over and assume their customs and culture is wrong). Once you’ve been to Nairobi the book is well worth a read.
SEE: Karura Forest is about a 20 minute drive outside of central Nairobi (or a nice long walk) and is well worth a visit. It’s a wonderfully peaceful place to wander around and has plenty of marked trails for exploring. Within 10 minutes of wandering through the forest I saw SO many colourful butterflies and spotted what looked like a dik-dik hiding in the bushes. *sniggers*
My aim was to get to Karura Waterfall and it took about 45 minutes to walk there from the North East entrance to the park. The walk was virtually all in the shade – see the beautiful canopy and trees with huge roots above!
The waterfall can be heard in the distance as soon as you stumbled across the small river. What’s so lovely about it is how secluded it feels and that you can walk across the front of it too.
A woman sat down next to me to gaze at the waterfall and asked me about myself. We ended up chatting about the waterfall and she said that she’s been living in Nairobi her whole life and that this was the first time she’d visited! Apparently it’s a place people know about but don’t really go. So get yourself ahead of the locals and visit đ Is there anything better (lions aside) than the sound of water?
Elsewhere in Karura Forest you’ll find wildlife, nature trails, the lovely lily pond above (again, very secluded, had to walk through a maze of bushes to get to it on the South West exit of the park) and a pricey cafe too. It’s pricey because the views are stunning… worth nipping in for a cold beer after you’ve meandered around the park though!
LISTEN: When I travel, I want to eat where the locals eat. Unfortunately, when you go on organised tours, the tour leader is forced to recommend places that are tried and tested (which I understand) â but I wasnât having any of it. I did some digging and found a place called KâOsewe Ranalo Foods, about 5 minutes from my hotel. I loved it so much, I went there twice.
First visit was just food. Itâs back to basics Kenyan cuisine; beef, goat or Tilipia fish with either ugali or chapatti and either tomatoes or spinach. This is essentially as Kenyan as you can get. The food was simple but DELICIOUS. The beef was tender and the goat (not something Iâve actually tried before) was full of flavour. But the highlight was the chapatti; East Africa has a mix of British, Arab and Indian influence and chapatti is a Kenyan staple. Ronalo Foods have completely nailed the chapatti; itâs one of the best Iâve ever had (and trust me, Iâve had a lot). Add to this the fact that for a meal and a beer it only costs about ÂŁ3 and youâve discovered a new favourite hang out.
While I was there, they were playing music which I LOVE; African Rhumba. I asked the waiter for the name of the artist and it turns out it was Franco of TP OK Jazz; a group my Kenyan driver on my last Tucan Tour, Timan, had gotten me into. The waiter said that the following night there would be a live African Rhumba band. So, of course, I went back the next night to drink and dance.
The music was amazing, but more so was watching the Nairobians dancing. Kim and I were the only white people there (again, itâs the kind of restaurant / bar that locals go to and tourists would usually never know existed). The dancing was INCREDIBLE; Africans honestly have movement sewn up. The women would barely move at all â slow, sexy dancing, all with their bums and hips. The men would dance to the side of the women, barely touching them but again, allll the movement in the hips. Itâs amazing to watch; they honestly donât walk or âmoveâ when the music starts to play, every movement they make it a dance in itself.
The type of music that was playing is below. 2nd generation African Rhumba (from the 60s) and is from DR Congo â itâs incredible. Itâs music you can’t keep still to.
(My white girl dancing went down a storm to this, hahaha). Can seriously recommend as well as checking out TP OK Jazz, you should definitely visit Ronalo Foods for great food, a fantastic atmosphere and a brilliant night out.
LOVE: Oh, Kenya. If youâre a white woman who has boobs and bum, head immediately to Kenya for an ego-boost. Youâll get hit on everywhere, by servers and tour guides to barmen and locals⊠and kids on the street. I got two marriage proposals in one day just wandering through the streets of Old Town â this isnât me bragging at all, itâs just standard course in East Africa.
The local men seem to think:
1. That white women are easy (well, theyâre certainly easier than local women I guess due to the religious society and that men still dominate in terms of rights and economics).
2. That white women are different (and in the same way I love speaking to people to learn about their culture, they love quizzing me).
And 3. Theyâre not used to seeing a white woman with boobs, bum and thighs but without a huge stomach. Iâd get men shouting crap like âwowâ and making comments about the way my hips move when I was just minding my own business walking down the street. Honestly, the ego boost is insane. Pretty much felt like Beyonce must do on a minutely basis.
I got the above information not only through my experience but by asking the local men / my tour leader. I also learned from my tour leader that in East Africa itâs legal for men to have multiple wives; the Maasai men have a âmainâ wife (his first) and then various others. A lot of the men who work in Nairobi travel in there from hours out of town, so while theyâre in Nairobi during the week theyâll get a mistress too. This is completely normal for the men and the women all know that this is going on too (wives included).
Having not had the chance to speak to any local women about it, I donât know if theyâre honestly ok with their husband doing what he wants with other women or if itâs just such a part of their culture that they feel they canât fight it. Probably the latter, Iâd imagine. Speaking with the men I told them I think itâs completely fine if their wives can sleep with other men too. Some local men understood my point of view, others Did. Not. At. All. Was interesting having conversations with them about it⊠and speaking with various men on nights out, only to have my tour leader tell me she knows theyâre married. So yeah â watch out for that if being a mistress ainât your thing!
Maasai Mara The Maasai Mara is a National Park about a 5-hour drive from Nairobi. THERE ARE LOADS OF LIONS THERE so obviously I was very happy to be heading out from Nairobi to my first safari of the trip.
I went to the Maasai Mara using a third party (not Tucan Travel) and stayed in an eco-lodge just outside the park gates (sounds fancier than it was). When I was there I got my first bedbug bites (we slept in permanent tents) and one evening I heard a rustling next to my bed. I decided it must be something wandering around outside so went to unroll the tent flap to cover the âwindowâ⊠and found a mouse clinging to the side of the tent. Obviously, Iâm cool with lions and later in the trip came face to face with a hyena in the middle of the night, but I freaked out when I saw a mouse and went to get one of the Maasai to help get rid of it. To be honest, a mouse and some bed bugs are just part of the course when camping next to a National Park, so all good.
This section looks at things I learned and did while on my three day Maasai Mara trip! One of which (and I have to note this down) was discover one of the best soaps EVER: itâs on 8pm-9pm and every night after dinner we watched it with the locals who were just as obsessed with it. ALL SORTS OF DRAMA. And a girl with half white half black hair⊠who screwed over another girl by framing her and sending her to jail⊠or something. It got very complicated and it was also subtitled in Portuguese which didnât make things any easier. Anyway, I cannot remember what itâs called for the LIFE of me but I couldnât NOT reference it in this blog post.
EAT: Maize. Itâs a staple of the Kenyan diet and is used to make ugali and basically most dishes. Youâll find people on the side of roads, on roundabouts, outside shops and in all sorts of places cooking maize over coal and you really shouldnât visit Kenya without trying it. Itâs smoky, chewy, and filling⊠and the photo above is me munching on maize whilst overlooking the Great Rift Valley. As ya do. Only thing that could have made it better is a bit of butter, but thatâs just me being a fancy twat.
SEE: ⊠which leads me nicely onto the Great Rift Valley! To get to the Maasai Mara we followed the road which hugs the Great Rift Valley. So, we obviously stopped to take some photos, eat some maize (and get hounded by souvenir shop owners).
Bit of a stunner, right? The GRV spans both African and Asian countries and 3,700 miles. INSANE RIGHT?! So this is what Kenyaâs section looks like. It was basically formed thanks to those lovely plates moving and a huge amount of land sinking. In the GRV life goes on much as it does outside it â Maasai tribes wander, monkeys roam, kids go to school⊠but just in a more epic place, I guess!
Views for dayyyys and definitely worth a stop.
SEE: So the main thing to see in the Maasai Mara National Reserve are the incredible animals. Obviously numerous Lion King references were made (especially as the zebras and wildebeest were starting off on their migration) but when you go on Safari the Lion King disappears and you are just struck by the simple beauty of the plains and the wildlife.
I saw all of the Big 5 except the leopard (Big 5 â Elephant, Lion, Buffalo, Leopard and Rhino) in the Mara and around (what felt like) a million giraffes, zebra and wildebeest. I also spotted a crocodile, a fair few hippos and a vulture or two. Plus, saw cheetahs in the wild for the very first time!
Waking up at 5am for safari (the animals wander around and hunt when itâs cool and rest in the heat of the Kenyan sun⊠after all, the equator runs through Kenya, so they deserve a bit of a nap under a tree at midday)! Iâm NOT a morning person, but have no problem whatsoever waking up knowing that I could see a lion. And, I totally did. LOOK AT THE BABES BELOW!
A safari is a spectacular experience and every time itâs a mix of adrenaline (when you spot the animal youâve been hoping for) and anticipation (hearing messages from the other safari drivers, wondering if weâll get to the animals in time, searching the hills and ploughing over dirt tracks in the hope of spotting something, ANYTHING) â thereâs nothing quite like it.
One thing â Iâve been on safaris in South Africa, Zambia, Namibia, Tanzania and Botswana and of all the National Parks in Africa Iâve visited, the safari drivers made me feel more uncomfortable than usual in the Maasai Mara. Simply because they got SO close to the animals⊠which I donât like. I donât want a car to be blocking their path, I donât want them to be scared or to change course to avoid a truck. But our driver (ALL drivers) got very, very close to the animals which, although wonderful in terms of taking photos, didnât sit well with me. Unfortunately, itâs just how things are done in the Mara it seems, so something to be aware of!
I didnât see the black-maned lion of the Maasai Mara⊠which gives me a reason to go back đ The sunset  above is another reason. Sigh.
LISTEN: The Maasai are nomads â they (used to) rarely stay in one place longer than 6 months to a year before moving their cattle, family and belongings across the plains. The Maasai Mara is a ânature reserveâ because it is the Maasaiâs land and from time to time youâd spot a Maasai wrapped in their usual red, checked cloaks, herding cattle across the plains next to an elephant or three. In a National Park, humans arenât allowed free reign, so the Maasai must keep out.
My campsite was next to a Maasai village so we went and had a tour and asked some questions of the Maasai; after all, the Maasai no longer move like they used to and are trying to live a traditional existence while incorporating modern teachings and technology into it.
Some things I learned about the Maasai: they still use cattle in dowries and dowries are totally still a thing. However, a man can pay a smaller dowry the higher he can jump. So obviously all the men on the tour (well, both of them) had a jumping contest and the Maasai men leapt about 4 foot in the air with us lot getting maybe 2 foot if we were REALLY enthusiastic.
The Maasai wear red cloth to scare lions. Red is the colour of East Africa thanks to the Maasai culture. Interestingly, itâs the reason why EVERYONE in Kenya/Tanzania supports either Man U, Liverpool or Arsenal⊠because they have red football kit!
Boys are circumcised at aged 12 and without any drugs â it is done in the middle of the village with everyone watching, and if they cry or even move then they are considered a coward. Fuuuuck, right? Apparently it brings shame to the family and hurts your chances of marriage if you even flinch during the âceremonyâ⊠to practice for this, the Maasai men give themselves âtattoosâ, which basically consists of them heating wood and burning themselves with it. My Maasai guide (below) has about ten!
Maasai men can have multiple wives â their first wife is their main one and the wife does basically everything aside from look after cattle. She builds the home using mud and cow dung, she keeps the home, she raises the kids⊠etc. Itâs this traditional culture that is being, slowly, eroded and causing issues in Kenya. Apparently with the influx of Western TV and film, women are expecting men to be faithful and to, basically, make an effort: flowers, chocolates, etc. Something that theyâve not had to do before⊠interesting time in Kenya!
As part of the tour I not only got to jump a lot, learn Maasai chants, peek inside a Maasai home and learn how to make fire, but I visited a Masaai market too. A Maasai man tried to sell me, numerous times, a lionâs tooth necklace. Not only was I gutted that a lion died to make that necklace (he didnât get that I was sad about a lion dying as the Maasai celebrate that happening) but he also failed to understand my government would be well unhappy with me bringing a lionâs tooth into the country. So I left empty handed, but having learnt a lot about Maasai culture.
LOVE: I REALLY LOVE LIONS. Like, so much. They are glorious. They are the best animal in the world and I would love to be one, basically.
Letâs be honest, theyâre a big part of why I adore Africa and why I keep going back. Theyâre independent, beautiful, serene, fierce and the only wild cats that work together as a group. I mean, they are the absolute best. Anyone who knows me knows I love lions (I adopt one via the WWF every year, have numerous pieces of clothing with lions all over them and petitioned my Managing Director to allow lions in the office. I think heâs nearly convinced. Nearly.)
EAT: My friend Emma, one of the loveliest people EVER, recently got engaged. So, what better way to celebrate than with champagne and hotdogs? NONE. THERE IS NO BETTER WAY TO CELEBRATE ANYTHING.
Bubbledogs is a place Iâve been meaning to go for about 4 years, purely because of the novelty factor. However, when you turn up to Bubbledogs not only is the vibe non-pretentious (like most champagne places) or too hipster (like hotdog places these days)/ Itâs a great place to go with a mate, or a date, and just have good food and very good wine.
Sorry, champagne. Forgot I was being fancy.
The photo above is the New Yorker Dog (sauerkraut and caramalised onions) and the BLT (crispy bacon, caramalised lettuce and truffle mayo). We went for pork hotdogs, but you can get veggie or beef with all the menu options. They were gooood dogs too â generous portion, really tasty meat (so much so that all the toppings added to the flavour rather than masked it) and the menu is really customisable, which is always good.
We also went for the sweet potato fries and âhorny devilsâ (tater tots with sauce, basically) both of which were just as good as youâd find in a good restaurant, but they didnât break the mold. Which is not bad thing, of course!
Of course, we had dessert. It was a celebration, so itâs fine, ok? Chocolate Hot Dogs (above) with  chocolate ganache in sweet cinnamon brioche, cherry & banana sauce. They were good, but not as good as they look. If you have a sweet tooth then theyâre nice, get them â but theyâre not worth taking a ÂŁ5 punt on.
Finally, the bubbles. We opted for a glass (or three) of the Gaston Chiquet (ÂŁ6.50 a glass) and it was⊠well, champagne. Iâm not fancy at all, so it all tastes pretty much the same to me, so the ÂŁ6 glass was worth just as much as the ÂŁ11 in my opinion! You can, of course, also buy by the bottle.
SEE: I have a thing for graveyards. Cemeteries. Whatever you call them, I find it endlessly fascinating how people choose to represent themselves (or their loved ones) for the rest of eternity. Whenever I visit a new city, I always make sure I tick off the cemetery and park; theyâre the places in every town and city where you can escape the hustle and get some peace and time to reflect.
So, a few weeks ago I made a long overdue visit to Highgate Cemetery. And I cannot recommend it enough; itâs a beautiful piece of London with photo opportunities and interesting information a-plenty.
Highgate Cemetery is split into two, the East and the West. You can only enter the East Cemetery via a guided tour. This costs ÂŁ12, but also includes access to the West Cemetery on top of the 75 minutes tour. The West Cemetery is only ÂŁ3 to enter and you can do so alone. I would highly recommend the tour â both sides of Highgate Cemetery are well worth a visit and the tour guide I had was not only brilliant but I learned so many interesting things from him!
Did you know that the reason grave robbers were so prolific in Victorian times is because, by law, only the bodies of people convicted of murder could be used in scientific studies. But, as youâll be aware, medicine flourished in Victorian times and with only about 50 bodies available per year to play with, the medical profession were willing to pay good money for bodies which had been âacquiredâ. Therefore, there was a lot of money in graverobbing, which understandably, worried middle and upper class people. Hence Victorian graveyards like Highgate Cemetery â it came with high walls and guards, making it far harder for your loved one to get dug and cut up. The cemetery could therefore charge more money to people who wanted to be buried there and therefore had more money to make the buildings and gardens of the graveyards beautiful!
In the West Cemetery tour you learn about a poet who buried his lover with his poems clasped in her hands⊠and then decided he wanted them back a few years later, so paid people to dig her up and get the poems. Lovely. Youâll also learn about the work the âFriends of Highgateâ do to maintain the stunning architecture of some of the crypts in the cemetery, as well as visiting the graves of some interesting characters. These include Alexander Litvinenko, a man who took wild animals to events and who has a lion on his grave and in the East Cemetery, Karl Marx.
Did you know that in Highgate Cemetery thereâs a rare spider which can only survive in TOTAL darkness? There are some crypts which are sealed tiiiiight and this spider was discovered when one of the doors was unlocked to add a new family into the crypt. You can learn more gems like that on the tours⊠again, cannot recommend it enough!
LISTEN: Croydon â somewhere which is becoming increasingly gentrified (buy a house while you can) but, in some parts of the area, you can still find plenty of independent gems. I went to an artist showcase, put on by Innovation Voices (a company who discover and nurture urban talent) the other week and really enjoyed seeing artists who are not only not signed, but are in the very early stages of their career in some cases and are just doing what they love⊠and happening to be very talented!
LOVE: Iâve decided that the âsparkâ doesnât really exist.
Itâs âgetting onâ.
Itâs âwanting to fuckâ.
Itâs âconfidenceâ.
Itâs having similar goals.
But itâs not a âsparkâ.
For every guy Iâve been on a date with (including the guy from last week) who were perfectly lovely, had interesting stories to tell and I had something in common with and wasnât unattractive â Iâm sorry Iâve had to use the term âno sparkâ to describe why I donâ want to go on another date with you. Itâs only because I donât really know. All I know is that whatever *it* is, it wasnât there.
EAT: Evans and Peel Detective Agency has been on my London to-do list since⊠well, since about 6 years ago when I moved here actually. So, I suggested a speakeasy style bar and restaurant where you have to make up a fake case for a detective before youâre allowed in and my friend Jude didnât need any further convincing to come.
We arrived and buzzed: by the time we got let in (they open at 5pm â had to call for a reservation, old school) there was another 4 pairs of people waiting for their 5pm appointment. So, after waiting for the guys ahead of us to finish their chat with the detective, we were let in.
So, the story we decided to go for (I say we, Jude had nothing to do with it although he did a good job at playing along and not being embarrassed by me) was that we wanted the Evans and Peel to investigate the suspected Ghost Brothel next door to my flat. I was pleased to see a genuine look of confusion on the womanâs face when I presented this, but she played along well â asking how we knew they were ghosts and/or prostitutes, had we heard any noises coming from next door? Etc. When the play acting was finished (it lasts about 3 minutes) our case was taken and a bookshelf swings open to reveal a dimly lit, prohibition-era bar. In we went.
Jude and I went all out â cocktails, beers, mains, dessert. Mainly because the atmosphere of the place was wicked â fantastic music (instrumental of course and perfectly in keeping with the prohibition style of the bar) and we basically just wanted to hang around for as long as possible! The menus are delivered to our table by a server, in plain brown envelopes (but the fancy kind which you have to loop string around in order to close them) and youâre also kitted out with the likes of a magnifying glass too.
For mains, we went for burgers. The menu is a little limited â but not bad at all (see above) â and standard London prices. We also had a couple of beers to see us through too â again, limited selection, but a GOOD selection, which is the key thing. The burger was good. The way itâs cooked (on an old fashion grill or something) means you can only have it medium well done. It actually comes out medium which I wasnât loving, but I ignored as most people like their burgers this way and it was still a tasty burger. Chips were solid too, as were the sauces; nowt ground-breaking (Patty and Bun have nothing to worry about) but you do get bacon and cheese with it, as well as coleslaw. All in all, a good burger.
Where Evans and Peel really shines is the spirits. The cocktails are pricy (ÂŁ7-ÂŁ15) but worth splashing out for just once. I went for a fruity one (passion fruit, egg white, rum) and Jude selected a Bourbon from their EXTENSIVE whiskey and bourbon list. They have stuff on there which is ÂŁ25 a shot (seriously), so make sure you grab the magnifying glass and have a look!
When I said we went all out, I meant it. I also opted for dessert (as did Jude) and we both went for the ice cream cookie sandwich â blueberry ice cream with jam sandwiched in between two chocolate chip cookies. SO GOOD. I warned Jude not to try and bite the bloody thing because it would go everywhere⊠which it totally did. Tip: eat one of the cookies first and then you can bite your way through. Super simple, really yummy.
Basically; I loved Evans and Peel. Itâs a KILLER date venue –Â a little bit different, off the beaten track and the vibe is perfect for some romancing. Itâs also a great place to catch up with friends. What itâs not is a place to âgo out outâ for pre-drinks. Just sayinâ. Seriously â go. Itâs a place youâve got to try while in London; Iâm gutted it took me so long to get down there!
SEE: My favourite Shakespeare play is Much Ado About Nothing. Iâve seen it performed countless times, abroad, in London, in Stratford. And the latest production, currently showing at Theatre Royal is a really strong production. I should know⊠did I mention itâs my favourite Shakespeare play and Iâve seen it countless times? Yup? Cool.
The setting is Autumn 1919, with the soldiers (Benedict and Claudio) returning from the war. The staging is simple â all the action takes place in a few different sets and, I admit, it got off to a slightly slow start. Benedict was fantastic the whole way through though; the scene where he overhears that Beatrice loves him was fantastically funny and I think the actor carried Beatrice a little bit at times, to be honest.
Thatâs not to say Beatrice wasnât good, but the comic timing just wasnât there at some points. The actor totally nailed the âgive a shitâ disposition of Beatrice, but the scene where she overhears that Benedict loves her was lukewarm, with all the actors not really going as all-out as the male cast members had done.
For ÂŁ10 however (which is how much I got my ticket for) it was a fantastic production and I canât recommend it enough. Go!
If you havenât heard of Oddisee, how can I describe him? Heâs for people who want Drake to rap about something meaningful and put some thought into his music. BURN. But seriously; Oddisee blends hip hop, soul, funk and thrown in a hint of pop on a track here or there.
His latest album, The Iceberg is fantastic. Stand out tracks include Hold It Back, in which challenges inequality between women and men in the workplace, which refers to the current political climate; âWe gon’ push the demons deeper in the closet, It ain’t no secret they just seeping out regardless, We’re keeping logic hostageâ. Another of my favourite tracks is You Grew Up, which tells the story of Oddiseeâs childhood friend. His (the fatherâs) friend loses his job, blames âimmigrantsâ like Oddiseeâs father for it and their friendship has to end. Forward a good few years and we learn that his childhood friend is another white cop guilty of killing an innocent black man. Thereâs some ACTUAL shit going on in this album, but itâs thoughtful. It hasnât been thrown together in anger; Oddisee is interrogating the situation with his lyrics and putting them against a blend of funk, soul, hip hop music, all played by an actual band rather than a Drake 808.
Cannot recommend the album enough. And if you love The Iceberg and Oddisee, check out the rest of his tracks on Spotify. I have a soft spot for âMiamiâ â an instrumental off his album Travelling Man. For now, Iâm going to leave you with a recent track: Like Really.
LOVE: So, Iâve been on a few dates with a few people over the last couple of months. And something wasnât sitting right with any of them. That was, until the last guy I dated â then boom. It hit me.
The guys I meet online and usually on Tinder (so you can never tell if theyâre looking for anything serious, but theyâre usually not). Or, theyâre on OK Cupid and theyâve listed âLong term relationshipâ, âShort term relationshipâ, âNew Friendsâ and âCasual Sexâ in their âLooking For section to make sure all bases are covered. Which is fine.
But now, Iâm filtering out the guys who include âCasual Sexâ and âShort term relationshipsâ. Because Iâve realised I want something a little more significant than that. I only realised this when I was sat with a perfectly nice, attractive, intelligent guy on a date, but who I know has just got out a relationship and isnât looking for anything serious.
Which is fine. But when I left the date, I realise I just want someone I can rely on to do stuff with. Hence why Iâm not removing âNew Friendsâ from my OK Cupid searches â I want someone who will go to gigs with me. While I vent about my day to. Who wants to explore new restaurants in London. And I either need them to do this as friends or as someone Iâm in a more long-term relationship with, because thatâs the only way you can totally be yourself, right? If youâre dating someone short term JESUS itâs exhausting. The conversation, having to rock up looking great, having to always plan ahead in terms of what youâre doing. Second guessing the way they respond to you or touch you. Take all that crap out of the equation and I want a friend with time for me to explore London or I need to get past all that stressful dating stuff and just be comfortable.
So, all this dawned on me. And I turned the last perfectly nice, intelligent, attractive guy I went on a date with down when he asked for a second date because âwe want different thingsâ. At least he knows his thing is sex. Mine? As you can tell from my rambling, I guess Iâm still not 100% sure. Ho hum.
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